is he stingy or am i fazool karch?

[redvelvet]

@nadz123

he never says to melets buy ur sis/mum/dad/bro etc this unless its a bday..

At least your husband is being proactive when it comes to the b-days of your family members. Some husbands don’t even think about special occasions. Understand that personalities differ. Maybe he’s just better at remembering special occasions than he is with ordinary things. It’s possible that he simply trusts you in these matters and feels you know better about what things your family…or even his family…or your close friends…might need or want. He can’t fulfill every single expectation of yours…and you can’t do that for him. You’re both individuals…and imperfect at that…and can’t remain in a constant state of mind or mood.

i felt like he was looking a get out clause for buying anything expensive,

You can buy someone a super expensive gift they may not have use for…and then buy a cheaper gift that might be just what they want and need. You could spend a little over a buck for a candy bar…or drop hundreds/thousands for caviar…and someone might appreciate the candy bar more. And YOU YOURSELF (as your father’s daughter) have even noticed that your dad doesn’t use your expensive gifts. So, it’s okay if you point this out about your dad…BUT…it’s “not okay” if your husband brings this point up? It could be that what your husband had in mind for your dad (albeit cheaper) might be more useful to your dad. Moreover, he’s not the kind to force you to buy a cheaper gift…and he doesn’t seem the kind to prevent you from buying it either. Pick and choose your battles.

i dont know, i could be someone who likes spending, maybe im a typcial woman, however i feel like i need to explain purchases or explain things to him, albeit he never asks for one, or even insists hes joking.

You’re fortunate that you’re not married to a pinchpenny…who must know about every single purchase of yours. If he never asks you for an explanation…then why get so worked up over it? If he’s insisting that he’s joking…then try trusting him. And if you still have doubts about his intentions that are gnawing away at you…then talk to him about your concerns and he’ll clarify them for you.

mountain out of a molehill?

Yup.

is he stingy? or im wrong?

Hey may not be stingy…he could be just more careful about how money is spent (especially if he’s the only one who’s working). And that can a be a positive quality…after all…there is an upcoming baby to think about. Just because he doesn’t take the “initiative or lead” in suggesting what you should get for your family/you/your friends/his family…doesn’t necessarily mean he’s a tightwad. Could be he trusts you in handling these matters. And the only reason you have doubts…is because you assume that you should give him an explanation when he never asks for one in the first place. That said…it could even be your own fear. We don’t live with you…hard to say who is wrong or right. Easier said than done but pick your battles and learn to let some things slide.