Is falling in love a common thing to do?
Is falling in love as special as they say or has it been over-rated?
Is love slowly losing its originality and uniqueness as we over-exagerate it on tv, films, music??
I personally think falling in lust is more common than falling in love these days.
From seeing my parents, falling in love is very special and wonderful.
I think what ppl see in the media needs to be taken with a grain of salt. There is a fine but distinct line between like, love, and lust. smile
Learn to love yourself, then learn to love one-another
This is not my Paradise
Real true love, is the most special thing in life.
My parents truly loved each other, in a real commited way, not just a lot of romantic kissy stuff. When a man and a woman marry and become a family, that is the only kind of love that will keep them together.
Romance is all fine and well, but if there isn't unconditional true love, romance doesn't mean a thing.
At least in the United States the media makes a bad joke out of love. It seems to send the message that love is all fun and games, just a lot of kissing and other nonsense that really has nothing to do with real love.
I think love here has taken a turn to the selfish. I am sure I was born at least 100 years too late. I sometimes wish I could have been born in the early 1800's when people seemed more commited to each other.
Brenda
Hope for the best, prepare for the worst!!!
yeaha religions have made a big deal of love by making it a sin.
otherwise its nothing much.
What happens when we're dead? The irony is that all our questions will be answered after we die. We spend our whole life trying to figure out the truth and the only way we'll find out what it is, is to get hit by a bus. And the only comfort that religion offers is that God is driving that bus.
All racists who are prepared to die for their contry, please do that now.
Really? My opinion is tha religion honours real love and gives it a place of great importance!
[quote]
Originally posted by Shirin:
Really? My opinion is tha religion honours real love and gives it a place of great importance!
[/quote]
I agree 100%. Religion promotes love in it's more pure and true form.
Brenda
Hope for the best, prepare for the worst!!!
>>religions have made a big deal of love by making it a sin.
Falling in love is not a sin.
Islam, and pretty much all divine religions are against pre-marital and extra-marital sexual relationships (not love), which is considered a sin. Islam goes one step further and tries to stop it at source for our own good. It advises us to stay away from circumstances which can lead to path of sexual relationships. If pre-marital love/lust/infatuation/relationships will lead you to that path, stay away.
Love at first sight. I am sure it can happen. Haven't seen it though. As Munni rightly said, most of the time, people confuse lust and physical attraction with true love.
and, yes, it is over-rated. Too many movies and literature harping on the same concept.
[This message has been edited by Pristine (edited May 10, 2002).]
Pristine:
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how can you say falling in love is not a sin? prove it…
according to islam even to look at a man is a sin… Can’t remember that hadees but probably you already know it.
talking to opposite gender is technically not allowed.
so in love if you just look at the person, or talk to them ,than you are a sinner.
and one can’t fall in love without knowing someone…so
the conclusion is this that love is consider a sin. and poets, writees , singers and all artists have over rated it.
and religious scholars have make it a Big DEAL by forbidding it and making it a sin.
What happens when we’re dead? The irony is that all our questions will be answered after we die. We spend our whole life trying to figure out the truth and the only way we’ll find out what it is, is to get hit by a bus. And the only comfort that religion offers is that God is driving that bus.
All racists who are prepared to die for their contry, please do that now.
secret_obsession.
You are taking a very narrow definition of the word "love". Loving someone is not a sin at all.
As muslims we are supposed to "love" Allah, and His prophets. In terms of people around us, almost all of us "love" our mother, our father, our brothers and sisters, our spouse and our children.
So, loving is no sin.
Let me give you an example. A person gets married to a girl who is selected for him by his mother. He has never seen her before. On the wedding night, after nikkah, he looks at her for the first time, and falls in love with her. There you go - its love at first sight and its no sin either.
Its only the pre-marital or extra-marital sexual activities which are considered a sin, because they destroy the moral fibre of the society. It is for this reason, that it is encouraged that a proper announcement is made about a wedding, so that every one knows that this guy and this girl are now married with each other. Marrying someone in secrecy is not encouraged.
The problem with your argument is that you are assuming there can not be love between two people who are married to each other. Who says, you can only love someone before marriage?
In our culture, you will find countless examples of people falling in love with each other after marriage. But probably that does not make an attractive story-line for movies and dramas so you don't get to see that on the screen too often, and assume, incorrectly, that love can only be between two teen-agers (or 20-ish) people who are not married to each other. The rest is boring. Who cares about married folks, anyway. :)
Regarding your other points... its true that islam discourages unnecessary contact between people of opposite sex unless they have a mehram relationship. The reason is the same. To avoid placing people in a situation where shaitaan influences them to commit a sin.
There is no sin in a girl looking at a man, or vice versa (you are not supposed to bump into each other on the road). Or to talk for necessary purpose. Women are allowed to engage in business and commerce and are allowed to interact with men. Even in the days of the Prophet (SAWW) women were the ones tending to wounded men in ghazwas and wars. So it is not possible for them to do that without looking at na-mehram men, so any presumption that islam discourages normal interaction is incorrect.
It is, however, encouraged that all parties know the boundries of acceptable behavior to avoid unnecessary problems later on.
"Love", I'd stress again, is not a sin. It is only illicit sexual relations (which are prohibited) or anything leading towards that path (which are discouraged).
Pristine, you are such an eloquent person that i am convinced....love is not necessarily a sin. it can be sinless if people know what their limits are.
the example of falling in love after marriage is a good one. Yeaha, you are right whenever someone thinks about love..mostly they think about unmarried young couples.
okay, but still love is over rated by religions. There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably diserable.
What happens when we're dead? The irony is that all our questions will be answered after we die. We spend our whole life trying to figure out the truth and the only way we'll find out what it is, is to get hit by a bus. And the only comfort that religion offers is that God is driving that bus.
All racists who are prepared to die for their contry, please do that now.
In my opinion, true love exists but is very rare. True love is when every thing clicks together and there are no compromises required for a relationship.
Practically what we call love is actually not love but is a compromise. Depending on circumstances you meet someone you can get on with and you have this illusion that you are in love. Really "falling in love" is an adjustment exercise to deal with each other. So you may as well have an arranged marriage as you would have more of a chance meeting the right person.
I do believe that for every one there is someone out there who is the ideal partner, but I am practical enough to know the chance of meeting them is 6 billion to one !!
Falling........ in love
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and now rising....
see thats the theory of love... the feeling which u are pointing toward is not real love..
chill n peace..
.::. ﷲ ﻼﺃ ﷲﺃ ﻶ .::.
Allah-o-Akbar
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(O,O)
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-"--"--- To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target
just one question… how many pure love have ya seen where no sex is involved? if i m not wrong probebly 1 true love among 99 sex afairs. this is why religious scholars make BIG deal of it.
just curious..what EXACTLY is love according to you ppl? how would u define it?
some heavenly feeling you feel towards the opposite sex?
I will post what i think after i hear from
you ppl..
PS. nobody wants to hear what the OXFORD or ENCARTA says about love..WHAT DO "U" THINK?
Pristine bhai, good points and nicely put. I dare disagree though agar aap mind na kareyn
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. See, another reason for us being on this planet is “Worship” of Allah. And more often than not, love for the opposite sex is a deterrent to this primary purpose. There are many relations which are mehram to us, and we tend to ignore those, and are attracted more towards the namehram relationship if we keep contact with na-mehrams.
Thats how I think anyway, love for a na-mehram member of the opposite sex is a distraction from the righteous path, and results in us ignoring many primary duties. However, if its within limits(thoughts of the “other” do not haunt your mind day and night and you respect your Huqooq-Ullah and Huqooq-UlIbaad) then not much wrong with it logically.
ammar...
We have to keep in mind Haqooq-Allah and Haqooq-al-Ibaad. Taking care of one at the expense of the other is not encouraged. Having said that, marrying and fathering children is also a very important part of islam and is a sunnah.
In order to marry, islam provides some guidance on acceptable behavior, but it does not prohibit contact between members of opposite sex.
Islam is a natural religion, and falling in love is a natural emotion. Islam does provide guidance on how to interact and not let our desires take control of ourselves completely. There is a right and wholesome way to do things and those who follow that will be successful in this life and hereafter. Those who allow their desires to overcome rational and acceptable behavior will find out the result-sheet on the day of judgement.
ok…flamez has given a pretty funny YET true pic of what LOVE is all about these days.
munni said
“I personally think falling in lust is more common than falling in love these days.”
well how do u figure if its love or lust?
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if we go with how love is defined these days, there would be a very thin line b/w love & lust.
i agree to what inglandya_No.1 said:
“Practically what we call love is actually not love but is a compromise. Depending on circumstances you meet someone you can get on with and you have this illusion that you are in love. Really “falling in love” is an adjustment exercise to deal with each other. So you may as well have an arranged marriage as you would have more of a chance meeting the right person.”
i think that real love is created and not happens just like that. its a feeling which is developed over time through simple gestures of humanly love which show affection & care towards your partner. and i think arranged marriages provide a gr8 chance for that to happen.
this says it all…
“we come to love by not finding someone perfect, BUT learning to see an imperfect person perfectly”
i would blame the media for making ppl to think like that but i think its the viewers responsibility to differentiate b/w real life and fantasy. probably if this issue gets some attention from our leaders(which i think would never happen), than we will see a WARNING before viewing any movie: “Please do not practice whatever is shown in this movie. OR ELSE bear the consequences at your own risk”
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lets see what the “professional” guppies think of this..
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feel free to comment..
Ihsan_uk
now if you keep in mind what i think of it than...this really changes your first question..
"Is falling in love as special as they say or has it been over-rated?
i think love has a lot deeper, different & more practical meaning than what they portray it to be
"Is love slowly losing its originality and uniqueness as we over-exagerate it on tv, films, music??"
ppl confuse infatuation with love (probably cause' of the media), which would be one of the main reasons for which we witness unsuccessful marriages happening every now & then..
i guess it depends how you perceive love...
Falling in a love is a piece of cake mate
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but digesting that peice of cake is harder then steel ke chanay.
personally I feel its pretty under ratted and taken very lightly among our desiz…but consequences can be fatal as bringing down the twin towers.
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