Re: Is celebrating love not a part of our culture?
Agreed that many taboos need to be eradicated, but I don't think a commercial occasion like Valentines Day would do any miracles to achieve this.
Its just one day and to be very honest, I feel such occasions very superficial. They are just imposed on the grounds 'Others are doing that, so lets we do that also'. Not that I'm against expression of love through the means you mentioned in your post, but we need to understand that each culture got different boundaries to cherish relationships. Such boundaries are very much connected with the prevalent religions in those cultures. If we try to adapt a foreign culture, may be our own culture don't put that much resistance, which our religious values demand rightly or wrongly).
I remember once I had an argument with my friend (though he offers namza 5 times a day, but he is not typical molvi to tag haaza haram, haaza makrroh). He heard some colleague saying that the Prophet was romantic towards his wives and he objected to use word romance with Prophet. **When I asked him 'whats wrong with word romance? Its natural feeling between the spouse / couples'. His reply was 'I don't accept this word, as I perceive not in a holy way to be attached with a personality like prophet'. **Moral of the story is: We need to be very careful to adapt something which is alien to our society, as both our culture and religion got some restrictions. We need to bring / develop something original to eradicate taboos, rather than borrowing concepts like V-Day.
I totally agree on your view of Valentine's Day being just one day, commercial, et al and I don't see any need to adopt it wholesale. No arguments there.
The bolded part is where my concern falls. What is wrong with suggesting that our beloved prophet pbuh was "romantic" with his wives? It is a quality that should be cherished and appreciated....not buried away or hidden under the guise of shame. How does a husband being affectionate and romantic towards his wife make him less than respectable? Should we not exemplify such acts so as to encourage the same behaviour in society?
We are keen to imitate him in every other aspect but when it comes to something that could lead to the fulfillment of a carnal need (i.e one that is also considered a right of the husband upon his wife and the wife upon her husband), we find that less than "holy". I'm afraid that I can't agree.
Certainly there are restrictions.....I would hesitate to use language that is crude or vulgar to describe the act but to deny the existence of such feelings is ridiculous and lends itself to the belief that, na'auzibillah, huzoor s.a.w. was anything more than a mortal human being.
And I disagree also with bringing or developing something original to eradicate taboos. Let's begin with just accepting that which must have existed and not hide perfectly natural feelings behind an unnecessary veil of piety.
As an aside: notice your reference to the fact that your friend is a practicing Muslim, though not "molvi". this suggests that you respect him and value his opinions therefore if he believes that associating the word "romance" is not appropriate for a holy and revered personality, he must be right. <-- this is where the taboos begin or are reinforced. this is what we need to change.
