Self same delusions are the reasons for why people sit around single for a long long time. Married to their delusions instead of a real life person.
Talking of delusions, what about when you delude yourself that you're happy in your marriage for the sake of being married.
Interesting dichotomy ... the fact is one of these positions is inactive and the other is at least trying to do something ... if we look at it from a functional point of view ... our innermost purpose calls for reproduction to sustain the race despite emotional and physical attraction being there or not ... when a woman becomes a mother her hormones change her drastically ... she becomes a person who starts to think very deeply about the needs of people other than herself ... i.e. her children.
Surely when motherhood comes then even if a woman doesn't delude herself to thinking she is happily married at least most of those convince themselves that being in that marriage is best for the children.
our innermost purpose calls for reproduction to sustain the race despite emotional and physical attraction being there or not ...
not really buying this. but if incompatible people are getting married for this purpose, how is that any good? everyone suffers, including any kids stuck in this mess.
If i cannot hold a meaningful discussion with my partner to be then life may end up a bit boring. Yes values are important, granted.. yes physical attraction is important too... but if you add intellectual capability or the ability to discuss common interests, then all other abilities or qualities get a boost too.
but hey different people have different views as evident in this thread. :)
not really buying this. but if incompatible people are getting married for this purpose, how is that any good? everyone suffers, including any kids stuck in this mess.
In the context I was describing "incompatibility" translates to two people of the same gender. To sustain life you need only a fertile male and fertile female. Yes it is true that there are other factors that play a part in making a "happy" marriage ... but I was not talking about that in my comparison ... which was the better of the two positions ... to remain without waiting to get mr or missus perfect or get started with it will do.
You will be surprised how many people despite defending the idea of "total compatibility" have themselves settled for a lesser "it'll do" life.
that doesn't make sense psyah. to make a baby biologically it could even be.. say a guy and his biological mom (o hai oedipus). does that mean being married to one's mom is a start and better than being single? -__-
If it is present, that's great, but "emotional compatibility" is over-rated. Period.
Besides, emotional compatibility between two opposite sexes is oxymoron.
Men and women have different emotions.
Intellectual compatibility is also over-rated just because one cannot find that before getting married since no matter how much you try and use available tools/methods, there may still be incompatibility in this regard. Just a luck of a draw.
Intellectual compatibility may even lead to head on collision between partners and divorce.
that doesn't make sense psyah. to make a baby biologically it could even be.. say a guy and his biological mom (o hai oedipus). does that mean being married to one's mom is a start and better than being single? -__-
You are truly queer ... no ... being single is better than being married to one's own mother ... I was arguing within the confines of permissible marriages - marriage is for most of us here a religious act which has social impact - it doesn't simply mean cohabitation .. I was arguing from the perspective of being "inactive" and being "active" - looking for "who we can tolerate" rather than "who will make us happy forever" ... of course within the confines of moral limits ... and to add if someone special IS found then not to squander those chances by procrastinating.
i love your conclusion, diwana. LOL you didn't disappoint.
mm yes, men and women have genitals that are different too. and that's a good thing pal.
That's called physical 'compatibility'.
FYI: Compatibility does not mean similarity.
BTW: I knew and was thinking that someone may come and take my earlier post as somehow validating homosexual relation. Nope. Not at all.
Emotional and intellectual compatibilities are just few parts of overall compatibility.
yes pal, compatibility doesn't mean similarity. you were teh one saying men and women have dissimilar emotions and hence aren't compatible. not me. but thank you for seeing this. :)
yes pal, compatibility doesn't mean similarity. you were teh one saying men and women have dissimilar emotions and hence aren't compatible. not me. but thank you for seeing this. :)
And hence I had to came up with clarification. Knowing it might be taken in wrong direction.
Yes I did say dissimilar emotions may not be considered compatible. But what is more important there is both partners willing to acknowledge the difference and work through it.
I added that emotional and intellectual compatibilities are just part of overall compatibility.
Dissimilar sexual genitals still have (always) been considered compatible and for a reason. Rare examples do not make the rule.
