Ever wonder what will happen if the reverse exodus happens and Americans rush to Pakistan! (Masoom logoun kee masoom Khawaahishain --)
SCENE: TWO AMERICAN EXECUTIVES AT IBM, USA.
Alex: Hi John, you didn’t come to work yesterday?
John: Yeah, I was at the Pakistani Embassy trying to get a visa.
Alex: Oh really! What happened? I’ve heard that these days they have become very strict?
John: Yeah, but I managed to get it.
Alex: How long did it take to get it stamped?
John: Oh! It was a long queue. Bill Gates was standing in front of me and they really gave him a hard time the poor guy had even brought the property papers for his house in Seattle to show them that he will comeback …I went there at 4 am to get in the queue and there were tons of people ahead of me!
Alex: Really? In Pakistan, at the US Embassy it only takes an hour to get a visa.
John: Yeah! But that’s because who in Pakistan would want to come to the US except Americans who have now taken Pakistani nationality and want to bring their kids here.
Alex: So, when are you leaving?
John: As soon as I get my tickets from the company in Pakistan. I am so excited; I will be getting a chance to fly Pakistan International Airlines. Sort of a dream comes true.
Alex: How long are you planning to stay in Pakistan?
John: What do you mean by how long? I will try and settle in Pakistan. My company has promised me that they will process my Green Book (Paki Passport)
Alex: Really! You lucky person, man, it is very difficult to get a Green Book in Pakistan. Last year my cousin and his family went there on a tourist visa and they are now not coming back.
John: Yeah, that’s why, I am planning to marry a Pakistani girl there and then sponsor my parents and my brother and sister.
Alex: But you can find lot of American girls in Karachi & Lahore.
John: Yeah! But, I prefer Pakistani girls they are so much superior to ours and what a great tan!
Alex: What city are you going to?
John: Samarsatta, the company has its office downtown, yeah, the salary is good but the cost of living is quite high because of all the people flocking to this high tech mecca.
Alex: I hear the exchange rate is now $100 for a Rupee! That’s just too much! What about Quetta & Peshawar?
John: No idea, but it is cheaper than Samarsatta. It is like the world headquarters of technology.
Alex: I hear that the quality of life there is incredible?
John: Yes, you can get a BMW car for Rs 30,000, and a Mercedes for less than Rs 45,000, but my dream is to purchase Suzuki FX-800, which costs Rs.90,000 but what a sexy design, great curves and it purrs to the touch!
Alex: By the way, which company are you going with?
John: Jallalpurjattan Technologies, a pure Pakistani company, specialized in embedded software.
Alex: Oh really! You are lucky to be able to work in a pure Pakistani company, they are really intelligent and unlike American body shops who have opened their fly by night outfits in Pakistan. Pakistani companies pay you even when you are on the bench. My friend Paul Allen used his bench time to visit the Makran coast, the most gorgeous place in Pakistan.
John: Yeah man, you are right. I hope the US learns something from them and follows in their footsteps. It seems all we do is borrow more and more money from Askari Bank.
Alex: How are you going to cope with their language?
John: From my school days I’ve been learning Urdu. I always dreamed that one day I will go to Pakistan ever since my uncle brought me that T-shirt from Islamia College. At the consulate they tested my proficiency in Urdu and were quite impressed by my score in TOUFL (i.e., test of Urdu (like Toefl).
Alex: Boy! You are so lucky!
John: Yeah, I will be traveling in the world’s fastest train, Tezgam, world’s largest theme park, Charialand, and visit the famous Lollywood where you can see actors like, Nadeem, Shaan, Anjuman, Reema, and the not so Sharif Babara.
Alex: You know, Gen. Musharraf is scheduled to visit us next year and I hear that he may increase the number of visas.
John: That’s true. Last month, Infosys - Naswar Khan Pakhtoon visited White House and donated Rs 20,000 for Infrastructure development at Silicon Valley and has promised more if we follow the model of high tech city of Mian Chunnu and Bill Gates also got a chance of meeting him. Very lucky person.
Alex: Will you be visiting Dave? I hear that he has made it big there and now has a beautiful house on the Lyari river in Karachi. Good luck John.
John: Same to you Alex, and don’t go to the Pakistani consulate in a Shalwar Kameez (Pak. Dress) because they will think you are too Pakistanized and may doubt that will ever comeback and your application may be rejected. And, yes, don’t forget to say Asalam-o- Alaikum, aap kaisay hain" to the visa officer it will show them that you are a cultured person.
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Irfan Ismail