Some children are bossy or leaders by nature but how much do you think it is the parent’s fault? Do you think by over indulging our kids because as parents, it is hard to say no to them, do you think we are doing a setting them up for a harsh reality check? How do we raise children that are confident, not spoilt entitled little humans?!?
Re: indulging kids
grandma visits should be short 
ok j/k its been a week since my mom came and my child is already acting like he rules the world!
Grandparents aunts and uncles are exception because they get to spoil in small chunks of time unless it’s a joint or live in system where they sort of parent too. I’m talking about parents who cannot say no because they don’t want to let the kid down by saying no or be the bad guy. They want to instantly gratify their whims and wishes but in the long run, they are raising humans the rest of the world has to put up with. It can be the me show in their own house but not outside the four walls unless you are Justin beiber and even Canada doesn’t want you back.
Re: indulging kids
Not that I am overly experienced, but some points I believe in are:
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Don’t give (too many) compliments on everything your child does.
You will see some parents praising their child constantly on everything the child does: From drawing a tree to eating hiw sandwich and wiping off his own nose. This gives a wrong message to the child.
Do praise your child if he accomplishes something (especially something he was affraid to do) because it’s a good confidence boost. Don’t ignore his efforts when he does chores, but don’t overly do it, don’t make a show out of it. Otherwise you will create ‘princes and princesses’ that expect a reward for even daily chores.
Everything in moderation. -
Make your kid confident about the way he looks or the talents he has, by giving compliments such as: ‘you are looking nice’ or ‘that colour is looking good on you’, ‘you are good at xy’. But again don’t start throwing with compliments left and right, don’t obsess over it. If you overly do it, then it loses it’s meaning and the focus will be too much on appearance. I know adults who now compare everyone with themselves, and get jealous when others get compliments. Not healhty!
Also the child will expect to hear praises about his looks from everyone. If he sees that others don’t bestow him with compliments he will get selfesteem issues.
And learn how to praise. Don’t involve others. In eager: if you are complimenting your child on his looks, then don’t down play the looks/talents of others.
Your child has his plus points/qualities, and other kids/people have theirs. It’s not a competition. -
Learn your child to be humble.
That starts with you. Be happy and proud over his achievements. Share it with close ones. But not too much infront of the child and don’t yell it over the rooftops. -
Ofcourse the no = no rule!
I know how weak those tears can make you, but they are fake. After a short while the child will forget it and move on. They wont hate you and they wont be traumatized. -
Involve your child in decisions, but you make the final decision (the final decision should ofcourse also comply to your childs wishes, but not solely).
I am sure I didn’t say anything new, but still found it mention worthy.
Re: indulging kids
as someone said, your a parent first than a friend.
and everything Le Pak said.
Some people overdo the compliments. It makes me cringe. Compliments should be given, but in a timely manner and not just at every random thing. Plus, the sun really doesnt shine outta our kids behind… we wish and hope it does, but it doesnt. They are special and unique and beautiful, to us… but to everyone else, they are just another kid.
We can teach them to be confident but to be able to deal with humility at the same time. We need to teach them to be smart, but cope with failure. We need to show them love, but also be stern and disciplined at the same time.
Parenting is a real tough job. And some article on the net isnt going to teach you how to raise a kid. I wish some people would get off the net and look at their kid instead and realise their kid isnt a thing that a text book could raise.
I hate it… hate it when people say to me "we shouldnt say no to a child… ". I’d like to say… “please come and talk to me when your child stops kicking my walls and drawing on my carpet, until then.. keep your parenting advice to yourself”
sorry, rant over