inappropriate behavior of spouse

[DolphinX]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@hitman007

It has nothing to do with woman respect. I hate to say to it but i hardly see any one now a days who are not interested into this stuff.

Still i say its un ethical and should be avoided at any cost.

It has everything to do with how a man views women. If they’re seen simply as sex objects, which, sadly seems to be the norm in media nowadays, then he’ll have no problem looking at stuff he has no right to look at.

[Dhoti_Main_Dhamaka]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

What does his Credit card statments says?
any 1800 number $5/min charges?
Any of those pics saved on HD?

[madz124]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@aahmed

Well, maybe instead of condemning him you should ask him what’s missing from his sex life that he needs to turn to porn? If only talking about your sexuality and your sex lives wasn’t considered so taboo, desi men wouldn’t turn to porn. Maybe he’s into something that you’re unwilling to do? Maybe you’ve given him the impression that you are not willing to do certain things? I don’t know, but the point is, it takes two to tango and you should definitely talk to him about it without sounding judgmental.

aahmed, I don’t agree that it is necessarily the wife’s fault that her husband is resorting to other methods of pleasing himself. I had a friend once ask me for advice. She is Hindu and well-informed about kama sutra and what not. Her husband is a porn addict (has been since puberty). She only found out after marriage but when she confronted him, he said it’s not that their relationship is lacking anything, in fact he is very happy with her; it’s just that he gets a high from watching others going at it and he offered that she should watch with him.

[sweefs]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

mmm i dunno, depends on the extent of inappropriateness. if it’s like pics of beyonce in a bikini i’d sit beside him and be all “omg how hot is she!?!!” :jano:

but if it’s porn, then it’s a good idea to have a chat with him about it, as aahmed has said.

[Half_rupee]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

Dolphinx you are in for a shock, i dont know a single man who hasnt look up porn on internet(ofcourse i am only talking of ppl who are open with me and not my uncles and grand dad), and these are normal happy educated successful ppl who respect women.

[Half_rupee]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@missy1234

What would u do if you found out your spouse was checking out inappropriate pics online…confront or what?

Maybe you join him with looking up these pics as long as these pics are not illegal.

[DolphinX]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@Half_rupee

Dolphinx you are in for a shock, i dont know a single man who hasnt look up porn on internet(ofcourse i am only talking of ppl who are open with me and not my uncles and grand dad), and these are normal happy educated successful ppl who respect women.

Well then, let’s agree to disagree?

[Half_rupee]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@DolphinX

Well then, let’s agree to disagree?

im not disagreeing with you, i am just telling u what i know about normal man.

[Muzna]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@Half_rupee

im not disagreeing with you, i am just telling u what i know about normal man.

so then are you suggesting that dolphinx doesn’t know any “normal man”?

[hitman007]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@Half_rupee

Dolphinx you are in for a shock, i dont know a single man who hasnt look up porn on internet(ofcourse i am only talking of ppl who are open with me and not my uncles and grand dad), and these are normal happy educated successful ppl who respect women.

Boy do not argue with aunties…

They are not gonna understand how good it feels to check out that stuff

[DolphinX]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@hitman007

Boy do not argue with aunties…

They are not gonna understand how good it feels to check out that stuff

I’m 20.

[hitman007]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@DolphinX

I’m 20.

So? You are still an aunt for me…

[Half_rupee]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@Muzna

so then are you suggesting that dolphinx doesn’t know any “normal man”?

no, im saying the men she knows are either dishonest about it ,or she never asked them if they have ever looked up porn on internet.

[StormRaiser]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

^^

Totally agree. I seriously do not know why people are so scandalized. Almost all the people that I know have browsed for porn sometime in their lives. I think everybody here needs a dose of reality.

[StormRaiser]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@madz124

aahmed, I don’t agree that it is necessarily the wife’s fault that her husband is resorting to other methods of pleasing himself. I had a friend once ask me for advice. She is Hindu and well-informed about kama sutra and what not. Her husband is a porn addict (has been since puberty). She only found out after marriage but when she confronted him, he said it’s not that their relationship is lacking anything, in fact he is very happy with her; it’s just that he gets a high from watching others going at it and he offered that she should watch with him.

Let me ask you a simple question. This so called hindu friend of yours. How is she so aware of Kama Sutra if she has not watched porn. Practical experience I suppose…

[Reha]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

My impression on the subject is that every guy watches it. Its not a big deal and should not be seen as a failure on your part. I also find porn pointless. I don’t see what it does aside from get a guy all worked up only to find himself alone. That’s kinda pitiful IMHO.

I don’t know if I’d feel soooo upset about it.

[thedoer]

@aahmed

Well, maybe instead of condemning him you should ask him what’s missing from his sex life that he needs to turn to porn? If only talking about your sexuality and your sex lives wasn’t considered so taboo, desi men wouldn’t turn to porn. Maybe he’s into something that you’re unwilling to do? Maybe you’ve given him the impression that you are not willing to do certain things? I don’t know, but the point is, it takes two to tango and you should definitely talk to him about it without sounding judgmental.

You do know that most Desi women dont get satisfied by their husbands and that’s why they don’t want to have sex with them all the time and as far as I know they don’t turn to porn. For me it just seems like a lame excuse to watch porn saying that their is something wrong with their sex life and its her fault.

[Sara516]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@madz124

aahmed, I don’t agree that it is necessarily the wife’s fault that her husband is resorting to other methods of pleasing himself. I had a friend once ask me for advice. She is Hindu and well-informed about kama sutra and what not. Her husband is a porn addict (has been since puberty). She only found out after marriage but when she confronted him, he said it’s not that their relationship is lacking anything, in fact he is very happy with her; it’s just that he gets a high from watching others going at it and he offered that she should watch with him.

Why on earth would your married friend ask you (an unmarried person) for advice on bedroom matters?

[DolphinX]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@Half_rupee

no, im saying the men she knows are either dishonest about it ,or she never asked them if they have ever looked up porn on internet.

I do agree that 99.9% of guys over the age of say, 13, have experienced porn. My point was that guys who actually respect women, don’t view them as a piece of meat and understand the boundaries and rights of women will refrain from watching it. Sure, they may have tried it, but ultimately, they did not feel comfortable.

[ekumunng]

Re: inappropriate behavior of spouse

@OP

First of all you need to find if he has been doing this before marriage (for a long time) or he just turned his attention towards these things because some spice is missing in your married life. Does he spend quality time with you? Are you living a healthy married life? If not then take the lead and use your imagination, he is your husband so nothing stops you from trying out new things.

If he is an addict then you may need help from someone else… a family elder or a counselor perhaps. Nowadays men watching porn is quite normal, even if you like it or not. The point is that this activity of his should not leave you unsatisfied in your married life. If you are not feeling easy or getting your share then its time to confront him and tell him what you want.