Re: In My DEFENCE
u know us men get the rough deal both ways 
the ones who dont want their wives or daughters or sisters to work are termed fundamentalist, extremist etc. and the ones who want em to work are thought to be greedy and lazybums 
Re: In My DEFENCE
the ones who dont want their wives or daughters or sisters to work are termed fundamentalist, extremist etc. and the ones who want em to work are thought to be greedy and lazybums
Ham mard hai hee barai mazloom ... :D
Re: In My DEFENCE
i agree with you....
Re: In My DEFENCE
hey dawa-e-dil... you know u can multiquote differnet msgs and respond to them in one post :)
just keep clicking the middle of the three buttons in all the posts u want to respond to and then click the quote button in the last post. That way u wont have to make multiple posts :)
Re: In My DEFENCE
^ thankyou very much...
Re: In My DEFENCE
Alhamdulillah, I definitely agree 
We should be developing a magnificent ummah through our example and knowledge. Especially if we have the luxury to think beyond food, clothes and shelter.
I’m sorry lol what have we come to, subhanAllah… be strong! shabash!
Re: In My DEFENCE
people just say things like dat 2 get a gud rishta. ur correct it is ur right. no1 can change that
Re: In My DEFENCE
In My DEFENCE Yesterday, considering another proposal, something stood out to me in an incredibly awkward and confusing manner: what happened to my right not to work? The majority of proposals we’ve had to consider include the criterion- the potential wife should be a professional- she should work. But I don’t want to work. Why should I work. (Note, that does not have a question mark.) I won’t drown the faith of my right with a list of man-made (woman-made), fallible, circumstantial justifications of my right not to work. It is my right, regardless. Full stop. By Allah, I am not simply doing this to be contradictory- I do not find that empowering in any way. It’s just- is it just me or do more Muslim men want a working wife? What does this mean for the Muslim family unit? How does this collaborate with the increasing amount of research (for those to whom it is not already obvious) declaring that most children prefer to find their Mummies at home and to spend as much time as possible with them? And the research that declares that more men (non-Muslim!) wish they could get married and settle down with someone to build a family and home? What’s going on??
You're absolutely right. More men want to marry working women than ever before. And it's almost certainly not a good trend, and almost certainly bad for the family.
Once upon a time (while at university, basically), I was the type of guy who really would prefer to marry a girl who didn't work and would be a housewife. After all, that's what gave me such a stable and loving home environment when I was a kid.
Once I started working, my view changed. I realised that the cost of living is now so much higher for our generation than for previous generations, that life is significantly harder on one income than it was in our parents' time, or in times before that.
In other words, the cost of living now means you have to choose between either marrying a working wife and maintaining the quality of life that you were used to as you grew up, or marrying housewife and taking a large hit to your quality of life.
One of my own prerequisites is now that any woman I marry should have a career.
Re: In My DEFENCE
Atleast in pakistani culture you will still find many men who would choose a wife that
doesnt work.
Re: In My DEFENCE
:D
Re: In My DEFENCE
Impressive. (MashAllah). People like you are very rare. To be honest, in the present age it is not very common to see a woman who grows up in the west, and doesn't get brain washed by people who are struggling for the so called "Freedom of Women" in the form of either presenting women as a sexual object (by convincing her to decrease her clothes) or making an environment for her where she is convinced to go against her beliefs, do anything to please the immoral advices of the people she is surrounded by or to give up infront of peer pressure. (talking specifically about muslims)
Re: In My DEFENCE
there is nothing immoral with working. if there were no women working, who would teach girls classes at the religious school, who would examine women when they need medical attention.
Personal choices and all is one thing, but calling it immoral advice is rather ridiculous
Re: In My DEFENCE
if you want to be not working that is fine. but then perhaps, **also educate others to let them know, that**
it is fine. **
**as the social establishment that you are a member of, may not see it as your PERSONAL choice, but as a self imposed restriction - a hinderance, since u could not cope between the demands of the domestic responsibilities vs. ur own preoccupation of contributing thru ur education and skills (thru which in turn, u could make a huge difference in the lives of so many other woman, children and families. )
who is to give guarantee that when and if you do not work, you are taken for granted and held as a laborer?
i find it to be MASS MADNESS of all 'muslims' who have utterly forgotten that Hazret Khadija was a business woman some 14oo+ years ago. **
**her husband was her employee
she had a BABY GIRL with him
and ALWAYS confided in her, found peace in her Support
*so screw all those people who feel that it is a must - having control over a woman's life is to keep her grounded in side the house and get every right or wrong, (delibrately excessively impinging on her rights to be a live live autonomous human being) services DELIVERED, unacknowledged or taken as granted, until her death. *
there is some bloody thing called BALANCE between the family and the prsonal career - how come men and women who make up the society do not focus their damned energies of reckless NARROW MINDED NESS into something useful, on that 'balance'?
*dushwari *
Re: In My DEFENCE
**
[QUOTE]
i find it to be MASS MADNESS of all 'muslims' who have utterly forgotten that Hazret Khadija was a business woman some 14oo+ years ago. **
**her husband was her employee
she had a BABY GIRL with him
and ALWAYS confided in her, found peace in her Support
[/QUOTE]
First of all that was before Islam.
2nd she didnt go out of her house to do business, but there were people doing business for her, as was the case with Prophet s.a.w. **
Re: In My DEFENCE
grab the left ear, or the right - you are grabbing only an ear.
may u find comfort in limiting and depriving ur self and ur spouse of that God given equitability that is in fact ordained in Quran on all human kind.
Re: In My DEFENCE
You have the absolute right not to work. Just find the right partner who appreciates and agrees with your point of view. Islamically you have this right but on the main street demands and expectations might be different.
Re: In My DEFENCE
I don't think there is anything odd about a woman not wanting to have a career. Similarly not all men want career-minded wife either. So, if you keep looking I am sure you will find a win-win solution.
Re: In My DEFENCE
I am still looking for proof of some islamic 'right' of a woman not to work. I have not read anything that says that women have a right to not work, maybe i missed something.
If someone does not want to work, thats her choice and that is fine, but is that a religious right?