Ok I agree not every case is the same. I would love to have my MIL live with me when I am expecting. I don't care really. She is like my mother who will look after me.
But I've seen these girls who don't even live with their in laws and say all the mean things. I don't believe in judging people unless you live with them. I see girls who are always so negative. Everyone makes mistakes, so what if their in laws did to as some point. Ask your bhabis if your mother is perfect. I am sure she'll say at least few things that could be changed. So why is the guy's parents treated so differently.
I fight with my MIL just like i fight with my mom and I hug my MIL just like i hug my own mom. Its not easy, it takes time and a lot of effort. But last thing I'll do is say bad things about my MIL. I disagree with them somtimes and I let them know.
My friend's MIL/FIL are coming to visit their son for the first time and that too for only four days. She's been living with her husband ever since she got married. Don't the parents deserve to see the son and to live in his house for few days too????
All the negativity won't do anyone good.
I agree with you..they are just coming for 4 days so why is she creating an issue.. what if her parents were coming? i am sure she would be really happy then..
she is pregnant so guess she is stressed and worried how will she handle everything.
just try to help her
when I was living a married life & pregnant ,my MIL & her MIL after finishing food would used to go straight to my room and land on my bed and yes how can I forget the third person on my bed my MIL's son ! So I used to end up sitting on the floor after all the cleaning and washing was done by me and each and every bone in my body aching while they were resting on my bed with a nice cup of tea ! So things are not that simple at times. Inlaws can really test your patience.
I got a friend who had the same problem. she was living with in laws for few years..she told me that the mother in law and sister in law would directly go to my room after meal and would be resting in my bed. ..my friend had to finish all the work and she would be so tired by end of the day and sometimes her husband would complain that she doesnt give him any time.
but for spiral friend's case..she said the in laws are coming for 4 days so i think its better to adjust for 4 days..they are not here for a month or so
Re: in-laws…
If DIL is supposed to treat her in-laws like her family then can’t the in-laws make her feel that she’s their own family member now? Many girls are usually not ready to leave their home and parents for the whole life so how can they adjust and bring sense of ‘love’ and attachment for their in-laws right after marriage I don’t think that in-laws and the other people should expect that. It’s our culture that we bring bahu and we expect her to behave normally and treat us like her own family. we mostly don’t realize that she deserves such treatment from our side even more than our expectations. My mother also had a very worse experience of having irritating SILs but she never complained and that’s what offends me, every human has rights to speaks up if someone is degrading him/her. My first point is that in-laws also should treat her like their own daughter/sister, it’s always work from the both sides otherwise noone has the right to stop DIL if she complains.
By the grace of Allah I have a pretty sensible in-laws. My MIL is not here these days but my SIL visits my place every week, she never asks me to stand in the kitchen, she just wants me to take rest as much as I can. She never brings burden for me, though I try to make her feel that I am fine if I make something special when she and kids come at home but she never allows me, that’s her attitude which makes me feel that she realizes what condition I’m going through. My MIL sometimes ignores my health and asks me to do the things that I don’t want to but overall she is ok.
In your friend’s case I would say that might be her in-laws expect her to give company to them just because they are there just for ‘4 days’, that’s might be something which is irritating her. Pregnancy is INDEED not a joke but mostly in-laws have a view that ‘every girl goes through this period so what’s new to you?’ 