In laws complaints

[Tempe5t]

Re: In laws complaints

@anayakhan

Sorry about the bad text shortcuts lol

1. i insisted to let them go alone.they ve a 12 yr old son too who sticks to them everywhere so i insisted my husband to drop them n we keep my dewar
   They thoroughly enjoyed the movie

2. they complained that they are getting bored which is why we planned to take them out but since she had strained ankle n it got worse after she went back.she blamed us that we didnt think of her feet n planned to take them out
   They recalled several kinds of foods which they would wanto try.

3. i always asked her what to cook n she would ask me to keep meat or lentils out n she will cook.should i ve said no i will?

4. she wud knock at the door wen they wud hear my babys voice n wanted to take him which is why i used to hand him over to them .i didnt know they were thinking im relaxing n they shud look after him while i sleep

N for someone who said im putting up princess act .really?
I m honestly v confused

1. Next time don’t insist. Ask your husband …and he can ask his parents how they feel about something. But don’t insist or push from your end.

2. Next time if anyone has a sprained ankle, toe, limb, anything…avoid going to places that require a lot of walking. The mall is a place where people have to walk quite a bit, so it may not have been the best plan. In such a situation, a sit-down place…such as a restaurant, …or even just a long drive where in-laws can rest in the car and enjoy the scenery. When everyone is feeling well and capable of doing a lot walking…then you can plan trips to the mall and theme parks etc.

3. See, here’s the thing…some people play this weird game where they will offer you help and then use it against you. It’s not a strictly Desi thing. You’ll find this behavior in people of other races and in situations outside of the family…such as the workplace etc etc. You may have a coworker who offers to help you and then complains to a superior that you are incompetent. There was a member on here who had once complained that her in-laws offer to take care of her little ones and then complain to the husband that she inconvenienced them.

I know that not all in-laws are like this…exceptions do exist. However many Desi in-laws are from the older generation and they expect their bahus to pamper THEM…not the other way around. The reality is that everyone is an adult …nobody is a bacha…nobody really needs pampering…and ideally everyone should have tolerance and give each other a break sometimes…but sadly that’s not how it goes.

Some in-laws think that , “Hum itni door Pakistan se aaye hain…it’s a long and exhausting journey …we expect to be taken care of in every way and we should not have to do any sort of work at all. Even if we ask our bahu out of FORMALITY if she needs help…we should not actually have to lift a finger.”

It could also be an insecurity issue in which case no matter what you do, the other person will find faults. There are cases where the in-laws will even complain that “Bahu didn’t even let me wash the dishes or help with the cooking…she made me feel like an outsider in her home.” So sometimes you lose either way.

4. I’m not trying to sour your mind toward your in-laws. In fact, I think it’s best if you stop complaining about them to your husband because it may irritate him. Both of you should stop dwelling on it. You both should apologize, resolve to not make the same mistakes again, and move on. That way…if your in-laws complain again even after you and your husband did everything according to their wishes…then you’ll know that THEY are the ones being difficult. And even then there’s not much you can do. You won’t be able to please everyone all of the time.

5. So long as your husband supports you, that’s the most important thing at the end of the day. It makes it easier for you both to work as a team. So, move on it from OP. What’s done is done. In-laws are gone and you have a baby to take care of.