Re: In a mess and what to do....
don't let your past mess up your present and future, and also that of your husband and kids.
Re: In a mess and what to do....
She posted a similar thread last year as well (I was faarigh enough to go and check her other posts) and apparently she didn't listen to people's advice then.
Re: In a mess and what to do....
When the answer to what is the right thing to do is obvious, why ask the people here? If you're looking for sympathy, sorry that's in short supply around here, given that you are the master of your own misery.
You chose to reconnect with an ex despite being married. You could have chosen to not meet him or have him re-enter your life, instead you chose to invite temptation back into your life. If it sucks to be you right now, then that's your own fault. Now suffer the consequences.
This.
Re: In a mess and what to do....
...!
Re: In a mess and what to do…
Your first love. 
So you had two kids without love. 
Be honest. Leave your husband if you cannot love him.
This is a perfect example where one can easily say so called LOVE is over-rated and people find this as a pathetic excuse to do something which is not appropriate or acceptable.
(Considering for now that you are not a troll)
Re: In a mess and what to do....
Don't think about this any further.
Make a conscious decision to STOP thinking about it. Quit cold turkey. That's the ONLY way out.
Re: In a mess and what to do....
I ended up with an emotional affair while married and with 2 kids....He is my first love...I never forgot him and he came back and all the emotions were just back... Now we both know it's not right and dont plan to have any thing physically.... But it's emotionally so strong... And I feel like dying inside...I don't know what to do....Or if I will ever get out of this love of my life....
If you could not get over him in one year how do you expect to get over him now ? You posted same question one year ago and you got the same responses as the ones you are getting now.
You were in love with this guy for ten years and then he refused to marry you citing religious issues. What has changed after 10 years he decided to forgo his religion for a lost love ?
He is not a keeper from any standards.
The real solution to your issue is marriage counseling and psychotherapy there is no easy solution and answer to your problem. Only professionals can help you.
I will advise you to seriously consider this option and go for it otherwise you will end up messing many lives.
Re: In a mess and what to do....
OP, I looked at your title a few seconds ago and how it says "Don't know what to do". The TRUTH is that you DO know deep down what you should do........you just don't want to do it. So maybe you're hoping that someone on this website will try to validate your lifestyle/choices or perhaps make a suggestion where you won't have to make the kind of sacrifice you don't want.
I understand that people sometiems seek advice to sort out their thoughts/feelings. But I think it's kinda strange that you're asking for advice about this. I mean what kind of different advice were you hoping from anonymous people on an online forum that you won't also get from your friends and family?
I looked at your older threads from last year and once again you're asking the same question and you've received the same advice. If it didn't make a difference the last time....what are you hoping for now? If you yourself have no sincere desire/will power to change....then all the advice in the world will not help. For ONE PERSON...you are risking Allah's punishment, your reputation, your sanity/peace of mind, and you're hurting your husband/your kids/and families from both sides. Don't you find that to be selfish? Maybe it's idealistic for me to say this....but I think if a person "truly" loves someone......they won't engage in actions that would put their loved one at jeopardy. By maintaining a relationship with you.....this guy doesn't have much regard for your reputation and family.....he's putting you at risk.....so does he "truly" love you? From your previous thread...I'm guessing that your boyfriend....who was your ex.....is also married. Do you truly love him if you're putting him in a situation where there's so much at stake? Something to think about.
Re: In a mess and what to do....
OP, I looked at your title a few seconds ago and how it says "Don't know what to do". The TRUTH is that you DO know deep down what you should do........you just don't want to do it. So maybe you're hoping that someone on this website will try to validate your lifestyle/choices or perhaps make a suggestion where you won't have to make the kind of sacrifice you don't want.
I understand that people sometiems seek advice to sort out their thoughts/feelings. But I think it's kinda strange that you're asking for advice about this. I mean what kind of different advice were you hoping from anonymous people on an online forum that you won't also get from your friends and family?
I looked at your older threads from last year and once again you're asking the same question and you've received the same advice. If it didn't make a difference the last time....what are you hoping for now? If you yourself have no sincere desire/will power to change....then all the advice in the world will not help. For ONE PERSON...you are risking Allah's punishment, your reputation, your sanity/peace of mind, and you're hurting your husband/your kids/and families from both sides. Don't you find that to be selfish? Maybe it's idealistic for me to say this....but I think if a person "truly" loves someone......they won't engage in actions that would put their loved one at jeopardy. By maintaining a relationship with you.....this guy doesn't have much regard for your reputation and family.....he's putting you at risk.....so does he "truly" love you? From your previous thread...I'm guessing that your boyfriend....who was your ex.....is also married. Do you truly love him if you're putting him in a situation where there's so much at stake? Something to think about.
Don't think about this any further.
Make a conscious decision to STOP thinking about it. Quit cold turkey. That's the ONLY way out.
^^words of wisdom right here OP listen...PLEASE!!!
Re: In a mess and what to do....
U r right...it's my own fault and I am trying to get out of it...yes it was from last year and I didn't listen to people....I am just not strong enough...I guess...!
Not good enough....put your big girl panties on and do right by your husband and kids...either stop it now with this first love, or tell your husband the truth and get into counseling to see if the marriage is worth saving (that is if your husband even wants to be with you after learning of your "emotional" affair)
It's time to do right by your family...one year is enough time to figure out what course you want your life to take....if you're strong enough to get involved with another man, you should be strong enough to admit it to the one you have at home.....
Re: In a mess and what to do....
I don't think anyone here can help you.
You know what you're supposed to do...its hard but such is life.
Re: In a mess and what to do....
Don't think about this any further.
Make a conscious decision to STOP thinking about it. Quit cold turkey. That's the ONLY way out.
Why women always bring food in the discussion? what cold turkey have to do with this lady?
Re: In a mess and what to do....
thanks, you are absolutely right... and so is everyone else on this forum.... my reason for posting was just to hear this thing from you amazing people....
it definately gives me a will power to stay away from him... and thats what i will be doing now. Thank you so much guys!
Re: In a mess and what to do…
:k: May Allah give you strength to stay on the right path. Ameen. May Allah make this easy for you . Ameen.
Re: In a mess and what to do…
BY REMOVING ur question, doesnt make the replies hard to guess what the question was
Re: In a mess and what to do....
....
this certainly does not look like a mess. Its pretty clean....
Re: In a mess and what to do…
Thank u so much!!! I need all the prayers I can get…May Allah give me strength to stay at the right path,Ameen!