I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale *warning, this is VERY long*

Lifestyle Wedding, Fashion & Beauty
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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

Can I just say as a law student, you should not have been afraid of that DJ's claim. She gave little consideration for the contract i.e. she really hadn't acted out on that promise and you hadn't passed money over. It;s a frivolous matter because she could've easily made up the booking she made for you. Cancellations are part of the business, unless you agreed on a non refundable deposit she hadn't had a leg to stand on frankly, but then I'm just a student! Better to be safe than sorry!

Also, the fact that your photographer hasn't fulfilled HER contractual obligations after having received money is something you should consider taking up- people like that need the fear factor put into them! Always have a written contract with the stipulations and terms you want, and a penalty if those terms are not adhered to. Even if it's in scruffy normal language it doesn't matter, proof is proof ladies!! Paying £1000 is no joke! Even an oral agreement is a valid agreement! send her an email that you will be taking up legal action for her not fulfilling her contractual obligations of a pre and post wedding shoot, and see how it goes!

I feel for you hun, I'm also facing the risk of getting clothes made from abroad, scared out of my mind I;m taking the leap because my mum and sisters demands for clothes are almost bridal and I cannot afford £1000 for each dress! I will let you all know how things went with that hopefully!

Reading your experience made me so sad, I feel for every moment you stressed out because I am in a similar situation, eldest girl, never had a marriage in the family, working on a tight budget, taking the reigns on things since my parents are completely clueless too and not the most confident! I have to haggle and all sorts. I tell you this ladies, go for package deals with halls, but make sure you have a food tasting before you do so! Guests don't care about centre pieces, or halls, or decorations or even what you;re wearing for that matter in comparison to how the food tastes!!

Hun forget the past and remember the whole point was the nikkah, yoiu married the man who'll support you till your greying years and inshallah all of this will be something to tell the grandkids and youll all look back and laugh that it wasn't about the wedding, but the person you got married to!!!

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

You should name and shame all these people that messed up what should have been a stress-free day!! This post really saddens me but it's also very helpful! Where did you have your venue btw?It's a good thing that you can look back and laugh :)

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

Thanks for this post and for exposing all of the dangers/drama that wedding planning involves. Planning my wedding has taught me that people are generally selfish and will take advantage of you every chance they get. Furthermore, no matter what you do, your guests will b*tch and complain (at least the desi ones).

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

Please can you name your videographers cos they sound really good? Thanks.

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

As bad as some of these vendors were, I think you yourself want brides to understand that sometimes their egos get in the way of good sense, and they end up hurt in the end. Please don't ignore that, readers.

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

i agree on all points.
i'm sorry your wedding experience was so horrid, but insha'Allah your marriage is, and will continue to be, fabulous!

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

Aliyah props to you for writing this, I’m sure people will be able to learn a lot, when you’re in the moment, sometimes nothing makes sense. and you’re left with the shoulda woulda coulda

What seems to be the worst part is finding a vendor that doesn’t just want your money, or actually speaking up, why when we paying someone do we settle, maybe fear of being classed as a crazy bride?

My own expel was pretty awful; i got married in Pakistan, and was anti bride...lol not the best combo, but to cut a looong story short, post wedding, even the mention of it or the walima would either see me going into a flying rage or completely depressed, of course once the time is gone, there is nothing you can do, i have now been married for 6 years and only last year did i decided I’m over it, i still can’t really watch the film, but iv made peace with what happend, (before i would get upset if i saw someone else’s wedding) ironic considering what i do now..

For me letting go was the best thing I did, wish I had done it sooner, goes for anyone really, eventually you have to move on, even though it’s hard.

it’s funny i think we should all listen to our mums more, she would always say your blessed with a gem of a hubby, and children, get over the wedding! And you know what she was right. And inshallah i pray you’re happy too :D x

Ps I did have one question when you booked the photographer did she mention she wouldn’t take these “staged shots”?

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

Thanks girls.

uzzybuzzy - my videographers were Epic Media. They are based in Limehouse, East London. They are not only affordable compared to the unbelievably high prices photographers/videographers out there today but they are also genuine, honest people. Once you start planning, you will see the that photographers/videographers are SO stuck-up and egotistical.

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

Thanks Rabbia.

In regards to the photographer, whenever there was an opp for a staged shot she was always looking the other way. There is a group shot of my brother and sisters in the wedding hall and I asked them, did she tell you to take a pic together. My sister said no and that we were all looking the other way, and it was my sister who told my sister and brother to stand and pose for the camera. I mean, I never heard her say "ok, let me take a picture with your mum or your family" but then again neither did I.

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Re: I’m not a princess, this ain’t a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

hey aliya just read ur post … sad to hear this …i just pray that ALLAH showers all his blessings on u ur hubby & ur family.
may Allah creates love and understanding between u and ur husband as he created love between Mohammad SAW and Hazrat Aisha RA Ameen.
thanks for all ur advices aliya :hugz: i have noted everything in my mind

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

Thanks apple blossom xxxx

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

:( I'm so sorry to hear about your experience. You should try to let it go now; there is more to life than a couple of months spent on wedding preparations and what is done is done - just think you got compensation for all the difficulty you went through, in the form of your husband.:)

I would say to brides-to-be that when planning your day you should delegate tasks to other family members, but you get the final say of course. I think maybe you bit off more than you could chew - it seems to me you were doing alot of things on your own and that possibly made everything even more stressful.

And, another thing - get everything you negotiate on written down and signed by the vendors - if they don't deliver, they can be sued on the basis of the contract - in most cases they won't even bother going against the contractual terms because there is strong evidence against them if they do.

Thanks aliyahdar for posting about your experience; it's been an eye-opener to say the least.

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

I felt so upset for you reading this :( I'm getting married in November and I'm having nightmares about it! The thing that worries me most is the makeup and hair.

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Re: I’m not a princess, this ain’t a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

You guys read that whole post :eek: :eek:

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

Thanks for replying! :)

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Re: I’m not a princess, this ain’t a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

For mOre real Brides Real advice read here
[http://www.alizehphotography.com/1/post/2011/08/real-brides-real-advice.html

&](http://www.alizehphotography.com/1/post/2011/08/real-brides-real-advice.html) for tips http://www.alizehphotography.com/1/post/2011/06/view-finder-views.html.

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Re: I’m not a princess, this ain’t a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

Regarding verbal contracts , yes they are enforceable but you’ll also have to see if there have been any counter offers , as long as there are no counter offers the original offer stands then it’s enforceable.

Pre- wedding shoot may be a lil late in the day as a year has passed i think ?Though i suppose you could go with the reliance/expectation interest if you do sue her . But definitely get a post wedding shoot done and if she disagrees to pay compensation for the pre shoot , then tell her to do a 1st anniversary shoot instead. :snooty:

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

how is that possible bc you have places like shahnai that offer really affordable wedding venues and catering..the range is huge in houston. how many guests will you have bc recently i went to a smaller wedding at the embassy suites off of i-10 and kirkwood (area) and the ballrooms were really nice but not super big to hold everyone. i also recall the bride's father telling my dad what a great deal he got on the room. also in college we threw an eid dinner at a church's community center/halls and they rented it to us because we were muslim, god fearing, and weren't bringing alcohol to the venue. it was really cheap and we had a giant room to work with. so that too may be an option you may want to look into.

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

I don't want to go with shehnai cuz their food sucks... I had bad experience everytime i ate there :(. I called embassy suites and the new Marriott on I -10. Marriott is giving me awesome deal but i dont like their ballroom..so for now they are my backup plan. If I don't find anything in a week than I m def going with the Marriott.... I m going to check out Bella elegante in downtown he quoted me a good price...
There are so many venues in Houston but if you have a tight budget your choices are limited and if you have less than three hundred guests most of the hotels give you their small ballrooms which are not nice at all.. So this makes things little stressful :(

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Re: I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale warning, this is VERY long

aww good luck i can relate to that. I like Taj hall's venues but their food REALLY SUCKS however I was at a wedding in MAY and it was really strange bc I swear to you that shahnai did an amazing job with the mendhi and the valima food. The wedding was at Taj which is always nasty. Then In June I went to a wedding and shahnai catered over 30 dishes for the wedding and maybe over 35 for the valima and they had a table of just mexican cuisine, a table of just persian, a table of pakistani, a special table for just sindhi specialties (we're from hyderbdad), and a table of amazing chinese food. All of the guests agreed this is a big show to have so many dishes but people kept going back for more. Even women that are normally nervous about looking like a fatty went back for more. It was an amazing experience and the food was great. However the wedding was held by hobby airport and I think we all assumed it was held there because venues may be cheaper. I knew another family that married their son near Reliant at the Crowne Plaza Hotel Reliant Park and that ballroom was huge and pretty and I know that both of his parents are not really into spending lots of money and it was a very nice venue. It was very comparable to the Houston Mariott Westchase. Which is also another nice venue but i'm not sure of their prices.

Oh btw there is another poster on here that i ran into at the wedding with a ton of dishes from shahnai and she too could probably tell you how delicious the food was and how nice that venue was. I originally thought the girl must live near clearlake or hobby but no they are from sugarland so we had to haave driven so far for a good price on the room. it was totally worth it bc they fed us some of the best food ever.