Re: I'm done being a nice guy
Soemone wise said to me once - "expect from Allah, not from people". Don't change who you are - do good deeds and then forget it.
You are accountable for your deeds and he is accoutnable for his.
Don't expect people to return the favor.
Re: I'm done being a nice guy
and I am done being a nice girl
Re: I'm done being a nice guy
may Allah bless you for all that you did for them.
Congrats on the baby!
& dnt let petty people with their petty attitudes bother u! your better off without his congrats anyways!
Re: I'm done being a nice guy
I agree that everyone has user family members. Take mine for example. I use to have an aunt that split time between Pak/UK. Just before she planned to return to the UK for a holiday we'd start getting calls etc. Why? Because she needed a lift from the airport to her house!
Worse still...when my Nani (Nana) passed away (who was my aunts real aunt) she offered her condolences and then ASKED if I knew where she could get cheap theme park tickets from and if she could borrow our sewing machine!!!! All this while we were in shock and mourning the death or a loved one (the head of our family).
Needless to say we wised up to her using ways and have nothing to do with her now.
It sucks-the behaviour of these people but to stop us from getting further hurt we keep our distance. Of course we still do salam etc if we run into each other-but that's where it ends.
To Nice-Guy topic creator:
Man i understand ur hurt.
Me is been there, worse than u-trust me. So i also quit bein nice guy.
I am no more Mr Nice
U shud try to forget the jerk, and think of ur own family and goods as other people advised.
the only way to avoid such hurt in future is to stop being too nice, or if u do go the extra mile for someone, maintain the mind-set of not expecting anything back, just do it for God.
If i was u just to confirm ur suspicion...i wud get another 'common friend' of both urs in order make him aware or re-aware of it, and see his reaction then.
By The way Congrats on ur Baby
The World is Not A place For Nice People. Only for the Clever
Re: I'm done being a nice guy
If you help people expecting something in return then do yourself a favour and do not help anyone.
^ True....you should do kind deeds from the goodness of your heart without expecting gifts/money/fame/praise in return. But, in my opinion you have the right to at least expect **basic respect **from someone. I think what the poster is saying is that he helped out a cousin for 7 months and in the process of helping/interacting....they bonded to some extent. He didn't help the cousin to expect anything in return. But when he had his baby.....the cousin disappeared. Not even a congratulations. And that's not respectful. There are common rules for courtesy in society. If they did not congratulate him because they were unaware or completely forgot, I can understand. But if they DELIBERATELY decided not to wish him well and congratulate him....then that's impolite and says a lot about their character. A simple good wish would have sufficed as well.
But it's a lesson learned. And it's best to share your happiness with those who sincerely care about you. Next time, be careful around people.
Re: I'm done being a nice guy
The thing about being nice is is that its NOT easy....many/most times you are not going to be appreciated back or even noticed.
In situations like these, the sincere continue be nice indiscriminatly and not let other's behavior effect their nice deeds. So don't be done being a nice guy...Continue on. It's a lot more easier to be mean...but it's also something anyone can do, has no respect, or blessings from Allah swt.
Re: I'm done being a nice guy
I know how it feels- my sister just had a baby 2 days ago- and a family that we've known for 18 years closer to us than our rishtedaar hadn't even called to wish- i even told them but eh-- watever-- Who cares- but yeh totally understand--
But happpyyy New Baby-- may Allah (SWT) bless ur child and ur family :)
u can always count on ur guppies anytime!