Re: If one has a problem with their MIL...
... should one tell their husband?
By problem, I mean - if MIL does something that makes you feel awkward, or you don't feel like a part of the family, or you feel ignored, etc.
My friend's MIL makes her feel very awkward; my friend claims she never feels like she's a part of any family discussion/phone/skype. The in-laws live in Pakistan, her and her husband live away from them, in another country (husband recently went there, while wife is born and raised there). During my friends wedding, words were exchanged between the MIL and her own mother that just made things awkward. The MIL begins treating my friend coldy, they were fine and dandy before. My friend told her husband, who blew up at her and said she disrespected his mother by telling him this.
So, what are your thoughts? Should she have told him or not? Was the husband's reaction correct/incorrect?
I think the husband is at fault, not thinking of my bias to my friend... but if she complains about this to her own mother, it just makes it seem like she's edited/back-biting. The only person she can g to is her husband, imo. =/
Personally, I would view it as less for me to deal with. If MIL wants to limit her discussions to her son and whoever else...fine by me. I wouldn't care much at all...its not like there isn't enough to deal with on a daily basis. What if they start asking for opinions and then later blaming you or worse you get accused to interfering. These situations have a way of messing up. So, I'd rather not be a part of them.
She shouldn't complain. Count her blessings that she does not have to live with them and ignore the rest.
Understood. What do you feel someone should do if/when they do have a problem with their in-laws? Should they go to a friend/their own parents/siblings... ?
It depends on what the problem is.