Re: if in Khulla, the woman cannot give haq merh back..then?
tes sahar. i believe so.
The marriage payment or dowry (mahr) is the right of the wife/bride by which she is honoured and formally entered into wedlock (nikah).
Allah Most High says:
�Give them (women) their dowers.� (Surah al-Nisa, 24)
Hence, the husband is obliged to pay off this dowry, especially after divorce. If the marriage was consummated, then the full amount will have to be paid, otherwise the husband will have to pay half of the stipulated amount.
Allah Most High says:
�And if you divorce them before consummation, but after the fixation of a dower for them, then the half of the dower (is due to them), unless they remit it� (Surah al-Baqarah, 237)
This dowry is the right of the wife and must be paid to her and not her family. What the man gave the girl�s father as gift will not form part of the dowry, for it was not given to the girl, and also because it was given as gift. However, if the man clearly stated at the time of giving the money to the girl�s father that this is the dowry for his daughter, then it will be considered as dowry.
Therefore, you state that over the period of five years he gave his wife�s father money as simple charity (which in effect is a gift), hence this money will not form part of the dowry, and the husband will have to give his ex-wife the stipulated amount of dowry.
And Allah knows best
Muhammad ibn Adam al-Kawthari
Darul Iftaa, Leicester, UK
Re: if in Khulla, the woman cannot give haq merh back..then?
everything is fine lol, its not about me thank god.....its about someone our family knows and shes being forced to give khulla,. becaus ehe wont divorce her, because then she gets to keep her gold, and he has lied about why he wants it, inuk law she would put unreasonable behaviour as a reason.....hes basically made her life hell and says he wont give her divorce, these people are veryy clver and want their gold back- to sell. and this is their way of making money.
so in this case, she doesnt want to give gold back,she wants tp punish them financially as thats the only way she can right now. so in this case, what should she do..
Re: if in Khulla, the woman cannot give haq merh back..then?
yes we know. only those suffering know how it is. in a amicable divorce, or if she just wants to divorce for minor reasons yes she shud give bac....but when its done on the basis of her being forced into it, BECASUE they want their hands on her gold, she wants to make them suffer like she has, and witholding their gold will kill them. and thats worth it....atleast for the moment. see so many men playing this game, but when its a womans turn to turn the tables, shes called all sorts of names...
Re: if in Khulla, the woman cannot give haq merh back..then?
yeh, ive seen it too, my husband did say at the time NOT to cross it, bless him, hes educated,and he knows what womens rights are, but his dad and khnandaan said nahi yeh bas hota hai.....fazool. i didnt even know wat that clause was, until my husband told me himself, otherwise us girls, educated or not, just sign the papers willy nilly....
ido rem though, when i tried to read my own paper, my dad was like ohuuu jaldi karo, baad mein par laina..lol haiii......
its a very common custom in pak, people use sometimeswith or without malice intented..
Re: if in Khulla, the woman cannot give haq merh back..then?
I think thats something youve heard rather than seen. I havent seen it crossed out ever, then again perhaps my exposure is amongst the educated lot.
I was married in Pakistan. It was crossed out in my paperwork and that of my cousins. Without us being asked.
Re: if in Khulla, the woman cannot give haq merh back..then?
^ it is not about being educated. it is in the family and 'routine' ! My husband and I knew we are not crossing it but MY dad followed by my husband's family(All men , because the women didnt even know about it) created a whole fuss at time of nikah about it ! and all are highly educated too ! even the molvee sahib was surprised to see no crosses at all in the nikahnama and confirmed if the groom's family knew about it !
Re: if in Khulla, the woman cannot give haq merh back..then?
^Yeah I didn't know about it.
Also, the nikkah nama was in Urdu and I couldn't read it and so many family members were sick and rushed, I just wanted to get on with it. Totally irresponsible, I know, but that's how it was.
Re: if in Khulla, the woman cannot give haq merh back..then?
Khullah can not be stopped if haq mahar is not returned by lady .Khullah is right of wife and it has to be granted in any case.There are several rulings and judgements of Supreme Court on it.