…the solution is usually to send her back to her mayka.
But when a guy does…the solution is patience. Men will be men. Unka dimagh kharaab hota hai aur unko baat samajne mein time lagta hai. Sabr karo…vo aista aista samaj jayega.
What does that mean exactly? Unkay dimagh mein kya hota hai jo itna kharaab hai? Aur kharaab dimagh ko kaun theek karsakta hai?
If a man cheats on his wife…its apparently still not okay for her to leave him. Because she has kids and its necessary that his offspring see their father’s examples and learn them to apply in their own lives.
But if a woman cheated…she is scum.
When is it alright for a woman to call it quits? After getting an STD?
p.s. - I don’t want to say divorce is the way to go all the time but when is it okay in your eyes?
Re: If a girl acts irresponsibly in her marriage...
There is no formula for something like this, it all depends on each individual and the unique relationship they have with their spouse in terms of how much they would tolerate.
Re: If a girl acts irresponsibly in her marriage...
If they take a break and think without any influence (influence of parents, friends, society or even own ghussa) , most of the time guy/girl can figure out exactly when to call it a quit.
There is no 1+1=quit formula for this -- and there cant be.
As for "men are more tempered than women", its just like women are more emotional and expressive than men (in a relationship) , naturally. There is nothing much one can do eh?
Re: If a girl acts irresponsibly in her marriage...
I think you are talking about a "societal norm".
Just because that is the way it is doesn't mean it is right.
What's good for the goose is good for the gander too.
Now temper that with a gender's innate ability to execute certain behaviours and you will have your answers. (i.e. woman may have a natural inclination to exhibit more patience than men, etc., etc.)
Re: If a girl acts irresponsibly in her marriage...
I agree with
Is that always true though njgal?
bharti naari ka dil buhat bara hota hai. ;)
Itna bara bhi nahin hota
I think you are talking about a "societal norm".
Just because that is the way it is doesn't mean it is right.
What's good for the goose is good for the gander too.
Now temper that with a gender's innate ability to execute certain behaviours and you will have your answers. (i.e. woman may have a natural inclination to exhibit more patience than men, etc., etc.)
But one of my questions is...are men really that impatient? Are men really that incapable of understanding? Do they really need to be "trained" for years? (thats the only word i could think of right now)
Re: If a girl acts irresponsibly in her marriage...
...the solution is usually to send her back to her mayka.
But when a guy does...the solution is patience. Men will be men. Unka dimagh kharaab hota hai aur unko baat samajne mein time lagta hai. Sabr karo...vo aista aista samaj jayega.
*What does that mean exactly? Unkay dimagh mein kya hota hai jo itna kharaab hai? Aur kharaab dimagh ko kaun theek karsakta hai? *
If a man cheats on his wife...its apparently still not okay for her to leave him. Because she has kids and its necessary that his offspring see their father's examples and learn them to apply in their own lives.
But if a woman cheated...she is scum.
When is it alright for a woman to call it quits? After getting an STD?
p.s. - I don't want to say divorce is the way to go all the time but when is it okay in your eyes?
Phelay amma phir bewwi karti hay dimmagh kharab...
Our society has a a male dominated culture and every generation learn similar behavior from the previous one. Yes more education and liberal media has produced an illusion of change but fundamentally we are slave to our traditions.
Usually Girls are brought up to be submissive and guy to be more commanding. These traits ultimately define dynamics of a young couple's relationship.
I think a couple should have a heart to heart talk ideally before marriage or at least right after about expectation and responsibilities of each other but in reality very few do.
Girls are more to blame when they become a cliche of a woman's bardashat, martyrdom and sacrifice... If your husband is not pulling half of the weight of relationship then you do not*** HAVE*** to compromise no matter what.
Re: If a girl acts irresponsibly in her marriage...
Well I think any partner should call it quits when they feel they can no longer function as a mentally sane healthy human being. In terms of when that will happen, that will vary from relationship to relationship, individual to individual. We all have different breaking points in terms of how much we are willing to handle. There is no one solution or steps which can fit every individual or relationship.
In Islam divorce is allowed, not liked but allowed. Perhaps the woman will find a better man, or the man a better woman. There is no reason to kill yourselves in order to maintain the relationship, Islam does allow divorce.
So I think that when an individual (man or woman) feels that due to the relationship their mental sanity or physical health is at stake, it might be time to call it quits.
Islam has made divorce an easy experience, men are told to divorce their wives with gentleness and ease, and to not bother them after that, their also not supposed to take back any gifts/money they gave them.
A party from either side should sit down and see if things can be worked out, if not, let each other go with peace.