maintaining one’s identity as an immigrant family or child is challenged with either living in self limiting fears or fears created by others.
but one may be able to integrate and become hope oneself
for the original identity to remain viable.
idealizing any place, event, person, time or identity is not going to make any difference, unless the actual change is set in motion.
everyone has to think about families, and aging parents and new generation, but that does not mean to feel despondent.
if you are a true believer, and are pious - can balance b/w dunya and deen, by
living one in accord with the other, then all wondering will end on a relatively positive assurance.
there is a need to stop being susceptible to what is or is not, and begin to see what is and does matter from this point on wards.
it is not the long gone past, nor the unseen future, but a good idea of what kind of future one would punctually and responsibly want to give to
the next generation. if it is moving back to Pakistan, it is clear how worse off things are. so people will do so at their own risk/s.
and staying where you 're is probably not as bad as it seems, one thing that can destroy children’s sense of right and wrong is presenting them with double standards – please never ever indulge in them or let others commit to that fallacy.
parenting does need a whole load of patience and vigilance.
and that you will have to have in order to father a child/ren.
the place where you live and the kind of close knit familial and social environ which you will raise your child/ren in, will make it predictable how they grow up to be.
individual differences, fairness in treating all children (female-male and according to birth order), will have to fall in line with your own behavioral, intentional, attitudinal, and ethical actions and responses.
kids will learn even when they seem to be not affected by anything, they are noting everything.
it is up to the to be parent greatly, how firm they are with what manner of raising they plan to do and with how much confidence they will be able to provide it, to ensure a safe and healthy nurture of their child/ren, being aware of one’s identity and ethnicity is essential and we can integrate without becoming lost in acculturation, in fact we can teach good things to the society in which we live, if we do it right.
being true to oneself, hopefully will work the best in practicing one’s religious principles and values and in managing religious identity as well as practical living in a world will be do able.
what are some of the thoughts of fellow GS members, esp Moms and Dads.
share if you would like.
thanks,
Dushwari