I need to vent, yes. u have become my victim. No doubt, I am depressed.
I've been struggling with things this year, and im just sick and tired of it.
I cant cry and let it out, cause i see no point. But im sick and tireddd.
*Besides the fact that my physical apperance is killing me....everyone tells me i look sick and ugly. my face is skinny and all you see is my nose. I hear it every day from my mom. *
I have been struggling with acne for over 9 years. I have grey hair, and im losing so much hair. and im only in my early 20's. This past year, i've developed some sort of stomach problem, like constipation. And I AM CONSTANTLY BLOATED and feel sick. I think i may have IBS, which makes me want to bawl.
On top of everyhting. My skin has been irritating me so much over the past few weeks, and i think i may have KP. its disgusting.
The idea of the hair on my body and face irritates me... i wanna cry, I feel like i can never feel beautiful.
Besides that, school wise i feel like a failure im almost done post secondary...and now what? i suck at job interviews, i dont want to work in my program and im not sure what the hell i want to do after, and where i wanna go....i have 0 ambition and desire to start anything.
i feel completely useless and ugly and lost, and dumb.
i can keep going.
but i'll stop
and please i dont want to hear, there are other ppl going thru worst stuff. i hear it all the time. I want to vent, LET ME .
It's very cruel that ur Mum speaks to u like that, parents are the ones who are meant to reassure us that everything is going to be ok, not knock us down and I'm sure the things she says hurt a lot more than others cos she's ur Mum.
When I was in my v.early teens I developed psoriasis due to stress from constant problems with my Mum as well (slightly different we clashed as she suddenly became religious) but as our relationship improved and I became happier it kinda disappeared so I know how emotional problems can affect ur confidence and appearance. Like redvelvet has said go and see a dermatologist regarding ur skin problems, even when severe, these problems can be treated nowadays with things like tca peels, laser etc. and as ur confidence in urself improves u will prob find u'll start doing better in studies or job interviews. See a doctor abour ur hair loss and like others have said try and eat healthily. Spend more time with friends so u have a good 'network' of support that will hopefully prevent u from feeling too down, the more time u spend on ur own the more u'll tend to dwell on things and end up feeling more and more depressed.
Please try and start to take positive steps so u can get urself out of this situation, I know it's really difficult but if u don't try and pull urself up u may end up falling even further, the sooner u deal with it the sooner u can get better and inshAllah start moving forward and enjoying ur life. Ur only in ur early twenties u have ur whole life ahead of u, job, independence, having a family, all the best things are still 2 come :)