Re: I screwed up big time
don't rely on success stories to keep your hopes up. just because it's happened with someone else, doesn't mean it'll happen with you and just because it hasn't happened with anyone else doesn't mean it won't happen with you. your life will become what you make of it. work hard and you will find success inshallah.
the family and financial issues you're facing sound pretty common but what caught my eye is that your spiritual connection with God isn't there anymore. i found that truly shocking, especially considering your background. this can be on of the reasons you don't have peace of mind. i can assure you'll be a much happier person once your faith is restored. and i also believe that you need some good friends in your life. you need an actual person you can share your problems and other personal matters with.