there is not particular reason for me to write this post here. just sharing. it’s more like a blog post, since more people would read this here than a blog post so i am writing it here.
i moved to america about 11 years ago, within two months of living here i wanted to move back to pakistan. i didn’t like here. people told me repeatedly that i will grow out of that phase, and in few years i will not even like to go visit their because all the problems of electricity, weather, law and order etc will bother me.
well that didn’t happen, i waited i tried but nothing changed my mind. i still wish to move back there.
it’s not that i have any problem in america. i go to college, i have my own car, no one ever (american) been mean to me here, being a pakistani or a foreigner never been a problem for me.i live a pretty luxurious life compare to what i would have in pakistan, but nothing, NOTHING at all made me stop from wishing to move back.
i go to pakistan, and envy my cousins who live there. it’s not that my family back home is rich or elite in anyway. We are from an educated working middle family from karachi.
my extended family think i am stupid to think that way, some of my family member think i say i want to move back to get attention (rolling my eyes at them) but i can’t do anything to stop my self being that way.
i am quite unhappy living here, and to be honest i don’t want to be that way because that is na-shukra pan.
my game plan was to find a guy to marry, and stay in pakistan with him, cuz my own family have no plan of ever moving back or letting me go back alone, BUT in last 6 years of my search of that kind of a guy told me i should just give up on that idea.
when i was reading about nadz’s husband’s desire to move back to pakistan, for the first time, i complained to ALLAHTALA for making me a girl. if i were a guy i would have move back there without having any problem. why does guys have everything in life so much easier, without relying on anyone
i envy nadz, i envy a lot of you who are in pakistan.
i made dua to ALLAHTALA, that ya rabb, if you have given me so much desire to move back to my country, it’s only you who can make it possible.
so i am hanging in there waiting.
and while you guys are reading it, please make dua for me, that what ever happens in life for me in future is good in my “huq” and i can be happy about what ever the life ALLATHALA chose for me. cuz i hate being nashukri, but can’t help being that way.
Everyone wants somewhere they can truly call 'home' - as crazy as it might seem to other people all that matters is where u feel comfortable and want to settle :)
Aww yanzla. InshaAllah Allah will do the best for you, Aameen. It's alright for you to want to settle down here in Pakistan but just don't close the other doors on you. Life is not as easy as it seems. It's quite similiar with me that i want to marry in Pakistan and stay in Pakistan but most potentially good rishtas/guys are more inclined to settle down abroad cuz of the country's conditions. So yes it gets very tough to decide but at the end of the day you can't get all that you want.
C'mon karachi or Pakistan is not what it was a decade ago !
I moved back with same dreams but honestly they all got crushed ! May be that was the best choice i had that time , because i want to live with my mah and it is only possible by living in pakistan ..
I think we dont miss the land or country - we all miss a specific era /time of our childhood/teen /youth , which never comes back mate !
^ I dont agree with you. No matter what the condition be but something are meant to be dear to you. Same goes for the place of your birth, your parents, etc. Just because your parent or a sibling gets ill, you don't stop loving them or caring for them the way you did before. Infact most of the times it only increases your love and i think same goes for your homeland. I know i live here and face issues everyday for something or the other but at the end of the day i wouldnt want to live anywhere but here even if it meant i had a less comfortable, less safe and a more hectic life. What matters is that i will be happy with all these issues but i may not be this happy with all the luxuries i get if i move abroad. It's all about your priorities at the end of the day.
Everyone wants somewhere they can truly call 'home' - as crazy as it might seem to other people all that matters is where u feel comfortable and want to settle :)
i was 13. and yes you are right. my heart just goes for pakistan. it's not something i can explain to anyone. it's just the way it is.
Home is where the heart is
lol, and samosas.
Aww yanzla. InshaAllah Allah will do the best for you, Aameen. It's alright for you to want to settle down here in Pakistan but just don't close the other doors on you. Life is not as easy as it seems. It's quite similiar with me that i want to marry in Pakistan and stay in Pakistan but most potentially good rishtas/guys are more inclined to settle down abroad cuz of the country's conditions. So yes it gets very tough to decide but at the end of the day you can't get all that you want.
Chk your Pm :)
no maham, i have no closed any doors on my self, it's just that i would not be as happy with other options as i would be with the option of going back there. and i really do wish you can also find a great guy who will live in pakistan, and somehow contribute to make it a better place.
C'mon karachi or Pakistan is not what it was a decade ago !
I moved back with same dreams but honestly they all got crushed ! May be that was the best choice i had that time , because i want to live with my mah and it is only possible by living in pakistan ..
I think we dont miss the land or country - we all miss a specific era /time of our childhood/teen /youth , which never comes back mate !
you might be right, but i have gone back many many times since i moved to america, and i know how it is there. when ever i go there i use public transportation, i live in houses where electricity/water come and goes. as i said before even when i visit i don't live any kind of luxurious life just cuz i am coming from america. i knwo how it is like , but i still want to go back.
^ I dont agree with you. No matter what the condition be but something are meant to be dear to you. Same goes for the place of your birth, your parents, etc. Just because your parent or a sibling gets ill, you don't stop loving them or caring for them the way you did before. Infact most of the times it only increases your love and i think same goes for your homeland. I know i live here and face issues everyday for something or the other but at the end of the day i wouldnt want to live anywhere but here even if it meant i had a less comfortable, less safe and a more hectic life. What matters is that i will be happy with all these issues but i may not be this happy with all the luxuries i get if i move abroad. It's all about your priorities at the end of the day.
you are right maham. sometimes i can't exactly explain why i want to move back. but it's something like that. you live in a hotel which is great with all the facilities but how long can u live there? eventually you will miss home no matter how good or bad your home is, u would wanna go back there. and i just wants to go back home.
C'mon karachi or Pakistan is not what it was a decade ago !
I moved back with same dreams but honestly they all got crushed ! May be that was the best choice i had that time , because i want to live with my mah and it is only possible by living in pakistan ..
I think we dont miss the land or country - we all miss a specific era /time of our childhood/teen /youth , which never comes back mate !
I think other than these things, its the homeliness this country & the peoplke here give you. Its truly a homely feeling - no formalities nothing, you will see lots of relatives sleeping in one room with 10 mattresses and enjoying it fully, You will find a whole bunch of relatives having food together now and then, you will notice every one meeting people (who they dont even know) on Eid days in mosques, who ever's house you go they mostly gift you somethign to take away - No matter how tight any one's budget is they show the maximum hoispitality & love they can.
I dont think where ever we move, the love and not just facial expressions love but deep down heartly love that we all get from here is not matchable which is why its difficult to move from here. I too am one of those people who looks beyond the basic issues of electricity and 'halaat'. I love the people & the land, the time we spend here,the food, everything here is so unique in its style!
I think other than these things, its the homeliness this country & the peoplke here give you. Its truly a homely feeling - no formalities nothing, you will see lots of relatives sleeping in one room with 10 mattresses and enjoying it fully, You will find a whole bunch of relatives having food together now and then, you will notice every one meeting people (who they dont even know) on Eid days in mosques, who ever's house you go they mostly gift you somethign to take away - No matter how tight any one's budget is they show the maximum hoispitality & love they can.
I dont think where ever we move, the love and not just facial expressions love but deep down heartly love that we all get from here is not matchable which is why its difficult to move from here. I too am one of those people who looks beyond the basic issues of electricity and 'halaat'. I love the people & the land, the time we spend here,the food, everything here is so unique in its style!
You are so right.
There is this tv anchor who said something that really touched my heard. On the day Abdullah shah ghazi's mazaar was attacked he said something along those lines "what is the solution to all this? Just moving out of country? Let's say even if I do move out of here I can't take my parents or my wife parents with me so it's not like my worries are ever going to end or I will truly feel secure knowing my loved once aren't safe"....when he said that it made more sense than me re writing it but my point is that "halaat kharab hona" is no reason to run out of ur country where u feel home where u fit in where u are one of them. I love my country I too just see it passed all those bomb blast and other problem. Being there give me sachi khushi.
You are so right.
There is this tv anchor who said something that really touched my heard. On the day Abdullah shah ghazi's mazaar was attacked he said something along those lines "what is the solution to all this? Just moving out of country? Let's say even if I do move out of here I can't take my parents or my wife parents with me so it's not like my worries are ever going to end or I will truly feel secure knowing my loved once aren't safe"....when he said that it made more sense than me re writing it but my point is that "halaat kharab hona" is no reason to run out of ur country where u feel home where u fit in where u are one of them. I love my country I too just see it passed all those bomb blast and other problem. Being there give me sachi khushi.
Exactly!!! The feeling of belonging-ness cannot be replaced with anything whether its more money, cleaner country, better standards of living, hygiene etc.
To me the family life, the loving people, the hospitality matters way more. For me the Europeans or Americans are self-centered people. We all know what their own family life is. Majority of them just meet their parents on Christmas, what kind of a family life is that? if you cant love your own family who will you love? Here in pakistan, people tend to love not just their parents, children, siblings but even their chachay, mamay, phupo, khalas, cousins, dadi, nani, dada, bhateeji, jeeja, bhateeja blah blah. The amount of respect an even a kaam wala gives you,its nice. I love the relationships this country has and to me thats way above self-centeredness. For me this is happiness not the money i will earn somewhere.
door ke Dhol suhaane...qareeb aao to kaan phaTte haiN to insaan door bhaagtaa hai...jahaN use aafiiyat ho...shukria
Kitni dur kay dhool? All of us who loves Pakistan have lived there so it isn't exactly "dur Kay dhool" I have experianced life there just as much as any Pakistani. I m not saying all that based on some imaginary lala land.
Kitni dur kay dhool? All of us who loves Pakistan have lived there so it isn't exactly "dur Kay dhool" I have experianced life there just as much as any Pakistani. I m not saying all that based on some imaginary lala land.
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as someone above said correctly, its NOT the SAME Pakistan u lived 11 years ago and i assume u go to college so u must have been much younger back then unaware of harsh realities on the ground in Pakistan that exists NOW! i wish u all the best and evaluate pros N cons rationally b4 u make the move. again, if its NOT happening the way u want it to happen think Allah knows better and its not happening for a good reason which only Allah knows. Allays say o Allah gone me whatever i deserve and whatever is in my best interest in this dunyaa and hereafter. wallaho aalam bissawaab. aameen**
**
as someone above said correctly, its NOT the SAME Pakistan u lived 11 years ago and i assume u go to college so u must have been much younger back then unaware of harsh realities on the ground in Pakistan that exists NOW! i wish u all the best and evaluate pros N cons rationally b4 u make the move. again, if its NOT happening the way u want it to happen think Allah knows better and its not happening for a good reason which only Allah knows. Allays say o Allah gone me whatever i deserve and whatever is in my best interest in this dunyaa and hereafter. wallaho aalam bissawaab. aameen**
Thank you so much for the dua. And I do agree with u. I don't want anything from ALLAHTALA that is na'auzubillah against his will for me I do want to be happy in what he gives me. But ALLAHTALA Told us to make dua. And that all I m doing.
And honestly just because I moved here 11 years ago doesn't mean I don't know how Pakistan is. I even know the rated of per unit of electricity and cost of 1kg of sugar. I know the hard cold realities. I m mot in anyway expecting a dream word. but my mind still does not turn away from the thought of moving back even knowing all that. What can I do? I just make dua to ALLAHTALA for the best.
I want to move back to Pakistan too , but after:
1. The corruption rate goes down to .000001 percent.
2. After the electricity, water and transportation problem have been resolved.
3. There is no pollution in the air and water.
4. The best medical and education facilities are available at a reasonably affordable prices.
5. The inflation rate in under control.
My biggest gripe is against corruption. Anybody and everybody who gets a chance will not hesitate to commit any kind of chori . Then there are those who will find loopholes and exploit those loopholes. Everybody is looking for some kind of jugar to get ahead in the rat race , nobody believes in working hard and using the right means to get ahead in life.
I have millions of stories which I plan to share in my blog shortly.
was to find a guy to marry, and stay in pakistan with him, cuz my own family have no plan of ever moving back or letting me go back alone, BUT in last 6 years of my search of that kind of a guy told me i should just give up on that idea.