I know you are in a bad situation right now but sometimes stuff like this happens for the better. I went to a friends shower recently. She had gone to India a few months ago for her shopping. She chose a maroon outfit for the funtion at the Gurdwarah (sikh temple). She drew out what she wanted...gave the fittings...and went to pick it up 5 days before her flight back to Toronto and realized that it was nothing like her original design. Forget the top being ill-fitting...even the shirt was too big! She hated it...shoved it in their face and got her money back.
She ended-up finding another outfit at a different boutique...placed an order and rec'd it via mail recently. She says she loves this one more. So in the end everything turned out well.
You made the right decision by telling your designer to scrap the dress. There is no point investing more effort, time, and money, in a ship that's at the verge of sinking. You didn't mention where you live so I'm not sure how easy it'll be for you to get another outfit. People on GS are very helpful and can guide you depending on wher you live. Just pray that everything turns out well. I'll do the same. Keep us posted:)