First and foremost...always remember you wear clothes...the clothes dont wear you. When you shop, dont look for things that look nice on others...look for things that look nice on YOU. For instance, I was never able to pull off the small shirts and patiala shalwars a few years ago so I skipped them altogether and just went for what I liked instead. You cannot dress for others...dress for yourself and make it work for you.
If you want to look nice, focus on YOU first. Maintenance as I like to call it:
Get pedicures and manicures regularly
Haircuts, styles, color, etc - its important to find what works for you and experiment with different styles
Start off small. You dont need big things to be fashionable...I dont like big jewelry to be quite honest. I like small, simple and classic things. Buy yourself a pair of really sparkly studs, pearls, a thin gold/silver chain with a pretty pendant, etc.
What colors do you like? What is your body type? What kind of clothes are you drawn to? These are questions you should be asking yourself...fashion isnt necessarily about whats IN...its about making a statement unique to yourself.
Take good care of your skin and keep it in top notch condition. That in itself goes a long way to make a woman attractive.
You're not into these things because you havent found something that works for you. Once you do, you will be hooked. The other thing is, work out. Working out helps people feel better about themselves, increases positivity and health. Dont worry about losing weight...do it to feel better.
as far as your husband is not calling you simple (in taunting sense), why do you care?
btw, simple is GOOD anyway :)
No really, not when you see all these girls around you all made up and looking like models and husbands nazrein straying towards them. In my experience, husbands always appreciate a smart wife.
Thats the problem with us desi girls.... we don't pay attention to ourselves after marriage. I used to be a very simple girl before my marriage...... after marriage, my MIL told me to smarten up. According to her "husband ko khush rakhna hai tau you should look good" and she was right. Whenever I dress up and put on my "party" makeup (the one focusing on eyes), my husband always makes a good comment which always makes me feel good about myself. Now I shop for smart clothes (decent but smart), I make an effort every morning when going to work to look nice... and my husband does comment on it too.
Forget everyone else around you, if your husband smiles at you and says you look good, thats enough to make your whole day :)
P.S. I agree with Reha, what she says is how I started out.
No really, not when you see all these girls around you all made up and looking like models and husbands nazrein straying towards them. In my experience, husbands always appreciate a smart wife.
Thats the problem with us desi girls.... we don't pay attention to ourselves after marriage. I used to be a very simple girl before my marriage...... after marriage, my MIL told me to smarten up. According to her "husband ko khush rakhna hai tau you should look good" and she was right. Whenever I dress up and put on my "party" makeup (the one focusing on eyes), my husband always makes a good comment which always makes me feel good about myself. Now I shop for smart clothes (decent but smart), I make an effort every morning when going to work to look nice... and my husband does comment on it too.
Forget everyone else around you, if your husband smiles at you and says you look good, thats enough to make your whole day :)
P.S. I agree with Reha, what she says is how I started out.
I'd disagree. Not all guys like all "made-up" wives. No disrespect to ones who like but just to tell that another group of guys exists who like simple girls. Personally, I like if make up does not show up as make-up.
My point was only that be simple or in make-up, whatever it is, you do it for your husband so if he is happy for you being simple, you should not care about others.
tell me about it, all girls mostly dont wear gold in the uk/us, my auntie also says this to me just yesterday to which i repliedohuu pakistan mein logo kay paas aatta aur bijli nahi hai, lekin gold chain/angooti, wohhh to pehna hi pehna hai, floods horey hai, logo ko apni soney ki fikr hai....
clothes
make-up
jewelry
shoes
accessories (hand bag, cell phone etc)
hairstyle (if you don't cover your head) or even hijab style if you do!
matching
being conscious of your appearance all the time
following the latest trends
and as Reha above mentioned, your skin needs to be good so take care of it
and weight well, i think it's good to work on your body but your clothes should just complement your body overall
and also, work on the way you walk and carry yourself. your walk defines you. walk straight without a slump, sit with good posture.
I suggest you get all blinged up; put on every piece of jewellery you own. Then in your best BA Baracus voice, tell your aunty 'shut up, fool!'
Seriously though, this:
i know this isnt a reallybad problem in respect of others, but i feel like its weighing me down, i want people to say nice things, as opposed to to why am i too simple looking, or why am i not fashionable enough.
shows that your issue is self-esteem. A makeover may make you feel better for a little while, but for the long term, you're going to need to do some internal maintenance.
People are not obligated to compliment you all the time. There will be times when no comments (good or bad) will be made about the way you're dressed. That doesn't mean that there's something wrong with your style. Nor does a negative comment necessarily mean that either. Easier said than done, but don't base your self-worth upon what others think. Wear what you believe looks good on you and develop some confidence.
So I was thinking about this, and got a little annoyed with myself for providing an answer without actually providing an answer; pointing out self-esteem issues without giving any guidance on how to resolve said issues. I'm going to think it over a little, in the meantime does anyone else have any words of guidance on the matter? Self esteem/confidence is a tricky business, how does one go about acquiring it/them? I think I got mine simply from life experiences, but like I said, I'm going to think it over some more.
