I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

Society Religion & Philosophy
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Assalamualaykum.

I am fearing someone has done black magic on the girl of my dreams to prevent her from accepting me.

This girl* is my cousin (daughter of my mother’s sister) and Mashallah i have been in love with her* for over 10yrs now. She* was always so responsive and extremely friendly with me - we were actually the best of friends and everyone in the family know it. They all also know my strong feelings for her.

However, a time came when her* attitude suddenly changed towards me and not only did it change, but in a very short period of time - in just about 4 months, she* actually began to strongly despise me and now she* actually hates me so much, that she’s* insulting and totally acts as if I don’t exist. Infact when I sent a marriage proposal on her*, she* replied so insultingly. I know it’s her* God given right to refuse a proposal, but the way she* refused it and the way her* attitude towards me has changed is what puzzles me. And the main thing is, that her* attitude towards me changed BEFORE I sent the proposal - it was like in August 2000, we were so close and the best of friends and in January 2001 she* doesn’t want anything to do with me - and during this time we were not even in contact as she* lives with her parents in UK and I live in Kenya.

I’m in a situation where I can’t even get to talk to her* to know why she’s* acting like this. If I try to do anything to please her* or to try and patch up, from no where something so bad is going to happen, that instead of things becoming better, they become worse. Her* attitude towards everyone in the family is so nice with the exception of me.

Not only that, but at the time that her* attitude changed, all my businesses closed down, I’ve suffered from jaundice and hepatitis 2 times, I keep going down with headaches, I just experience failure in whatever I try to do - be it business, social, or whatever.

I’m fearing that someone may have done some black magic or hasad to make her* attitude towards me change so badly.
May Allah forgive me if I’m wrong as I do not wish to put allegations on anyone, but my fear is that my uncle or his wife may have done something because at that time they had 2 unmarried daughters who were getting out of the suitable age of marriage and they were hoping I would take one of their daughters. Infact at that time they used to also do funny things like give a bad impression of me to the girl’s* mother and to the girl herself*. One of their daughters (the older one) wanted to get married to me - she even made it clear to my mum.
Today both these daughter’s are married and infact the older on is married to the brother of the girl I love* - infact this even happened so suddenly and out-of-the-blue that everyone in the family was wondering how this boy suddenly developed feelings.

Please, I need some help. She’s* currently visiting here with her* mum. I can see her* slipping away from my life and this is torturing me tooo much.
Please help me. Please for Allah’s sake, for Rasool-Allah’s sake (S.A.W S.A.W S.A.W), someone please help me to Inshallah get her* to love and accept me in marriage. I am feeling so helpless. My businesses have all closed down but that does not bother me. What is finishing me is the fear that I’ll lose her* and I can’t take that. I want to love her* and Inshallah marry her*.

Inshallah help me to win her* back and for the rest of my life will pray to Allah for your worldly and Aakhirat success.

*the girl I love MASHALLAH.

Jazaak-Allah.

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Re: I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

:rotfl: if it isnt to be then it isnt .. Allah always wants best for his creation. and if a dream isnt fulfilled for you then its whats best for you.

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Re: I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

Sounds like:

1) She probbaly thought you were just being friendly with her, and she was probably never interested in you in that same way, despite lots of people in your family knowing you felt that way. Someone finally persuaded/told her that you wanted more than friendship and she's trying to keep you distant now, or thinks that being insulting and mean to you will "help" you to move on from her.

2) You live in an African county where diseases such as jaundice and hepatitis are mode widespread than in other rejions. It is not entirely surprising that you got sick, particularly when your immune system would have been slightly compromised by the stress from your live life issues.

3) Kenya's economy had gone through some turmoil in the past decade so again it is unsurprising that you had commercial problems.

You are not the first man to have his advances spurned when he thought it was going well; you aren't the first man to experience severe illness when stressed, and you are not the first man who struggled with his businesses in Kenya.

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Re: I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

long distant relationships never last people grow apart and other people start filling in your space...if u love her just marry her and carry on ur life .good luck

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Re: I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

post @ www.sunniforum.com

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Re: I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

Just do this after each prayer for 160 ( 40x3) days, remember missing one day would make you do it for another 160 days

After Fajr prayer, recite Sura-e-Baqra everyday
After Zuhar Prayer, recite Sura-e-Waqaya everyday
After Asr Prayer, recite Sura-e-Ya'seen
After Maghrib ( tll Isha), recite Sura-e-Rehman and Sura-e-Nisa
After Isha prayer, recite Sura-e-Aal-e-Imran and Sura-e-Maryam

Remember you need to offer all these prayers with Jama'at

Join Gym and workout for atleast 1/2 hour daily
2 Extra Nawafil at tahajud will be icing on the cake...

Pre-cautions during the Wazifa

1)Avoid Drama and Movies, if necessary then only go for sitcu oms like Friends etc
2) Try to focus more on career-building
3) Avioid songs, specially romantic one
4) Avioid cheap romantic novels and stories

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tab tak tu uski shaadi ho jayegi.

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^I know that according to Islam.....black magic is a very real thing. But at the same time we also believe that Allah has power over all things.

I'm not saying that black magic doesn't exist (because it does)....BUT....I feel that in desi culture.......people jump to the conclusion of "black magic" rather quickly as opposed to reflecting over the possible reasons behind their problems.

Now........you said that your cousin behaves fine with everyone in the family with the exception of you. And she spends a MAJORITY of her time with her family..............in other words she's NORMAL the majority of the time. If she's ONLY cold toward you..........then it's possible that she maybe had a change of heart and doesn't want to marry you. Maybe she is interested in someone else that you don't know about.......OR........perhaps she simply lost interest in you and doesn't want to marry a cousin.

^^^Maybe she is acting rude toward you because she wants to turn you off toward her. Perhaps she feels guilty about rejecting and hurting you...........so she is hoping that if she can make YOU hate her.........then you would willingly reject her.....and thus reduce her guilt.

Look at how bad the global economy is right now. And you should know that business is a VERY RISKY profession that can be subject to the economy more than other professions. It's not only your business that is suffering. There are other companies in the world that are selling out/closing down. Increase in the unemployment rate is another issue that comes with a poor economy. There are people that can't pay their bills or feed their families. You are much more fortunate than them.....so be grateful for the blessings that you do have.

^^^I've gotten sick several times this year: When I visited Pak, at school, etc. As a teacher......it's easier for me to pick up viruses from my students. It's amazing how one person can be among sick people and not get affected........and another person WILL get affected. If you're destined to get sick, it was Allah's will. It is said that Allah removes our sins during sickness...so try to see the positive in it. And be grateful that you have recovered. Hepatitis is not difficult to get........it can be easily transmitted through filth and other mediums. Also, your immune system becomes weaker when you have been under stress for a long time........and this makes it easier for you to become sick.

You said that you had 2 unmarried cousins...and that their parents were hoping that YOU would marry them. Well.........now those 2 cousins are married........so their problem has been solved. Their parents should not be holding a grudge toward you anymore. Instead...(if their daughters are happy in their marriages)...the should be grateful that things worked out for the best.

It COULD very well be black magic......but try to examine OTHER reasons before jumping to that conclusion. We're advised by the Prophet SAWS not to be suspicious of others and accuse others without evidence. And accusing your relatives of doing black magic (even if they are bitter toward you) is a pretty big accusation. It could be true...........but give them the benefit of the doubt and examine other causes for problems in your life.

******If you are not living in the same country as your cousin.......and if she refuses to talk to you and is treating your poorly..................why don't you talk to her parents or perhaps her brothers/sisters if you can trust them. Tell them that you're concerned about her and that you've noticed a change in her attitude toward you.........and ask them if she's okay and if she's mad at you.

Or visit her country......and personally talk to her. Tell her that you're not going to bother her if she is not interested in marrying you. But tell her that you feel hurt over the way that she's treating you especially since she doesn't normally behave this way. And then tell her, *"If you're not interested in me.....just be honest with me instead of hurting me like this. I will respect your wishes to be left alone. If I've offended you in any way, then communicate your concerns in a mature manner. I apologize if I've offended you in any way, it was not intentional. And if you're not romantically interested in me....then I hope....that at least there will be no negative feelings between us and that we can have a civil relationship."
*
^^^If you BEG and BEG and BEG her to love you and marry you and talk to you.......you'll just appear desperate and needy to her....and it will turn her off. If you talk to her calmly and in a mature way without forcing her..............maybe she'll feel ashamed for her behavior.....and some sort of peace will come about in your relationship.

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Re: I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

Peace ilmzomz

From the sound of it you have become hopelessly in love with this girl. If so, that will put her off. Most women want men who are secure in themselves, both emotionally and financially.

My recommendation for what it is worth:

Leave the ultra-melo-drama and become a 'lover of the Almighty and His beloved (SAW)' enough so that you need no other love.

Your post sounded really unhealthy and you know what I don't believe there is any black magic involved. Let the dunya (i.e. woman) show interest in you, then take what comes your way.

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You've posted this in religious forum. You sound too religious.

And for your problem, you seek help from people? Thought of consulting God? Why not pray to him?

Considering your situation, Im trying to avoid using harsh words but maybe you should instead talk to her & ask her directly what happened. If she is unwilling to talk to you, ask her family, mother or anyone who is close to her why she has changed her mind. And then from what you find, you may try to change / improve what put her off in the first place.

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Re: I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

omg how can u fall in love with your cuzin... arent we brought up like sisters and brothers... but with some families they say ur brother and sisters and then they get u married... lol but i dont think black magic is any thing to blame

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Re: I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

When the person you want to be with doesn't feel the same way, you just have to move on. We've all been there. Doing any more will just make you look desperate, and that isn't going to help. You have to move on.

Assumptions of super-natural phenomenon like "black magic" is a blame-shift reaction to protect oneself from responsibility.

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Re: I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

Maybe she genuinely has no lovey dovey feelings for you? Just because we love someone they dont have to love us back. It seems like she's not interested. If you really think someone's done black magic I would recommend you Surah Baqra. If you're a slow reader then you could perhaps read it over 3-4 days. I'm not sure if Istikhara would show anything. I don't know how you do it but i'm sure someone here could help :)

Oh and sorry if I sound rude but i'm going to be blunt here. You sound desperate and that would definitely put a girl off. You sent a proposal, she rejected, big deal. There are millions of girls in the world and i'm sure one day you'll find the right one InshAllah. The more you try to talk to her and convince her will NOT change her mind. If anything, it would make her adamant of her answer ( that she's already given). The girl you mentioned is being rude to you and not as nice as she was to you before. It may be that she's trying to make you dislike her.

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Re: I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

bhut zayada surah bata dee hain aap ny ..

manzil parho for jadoo and all ... daily...

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Cousins are na mehram :smack:

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Re: I fear someone has done blackmagic - pls help

No it's not black-magic. Your girl does not have the spine to stand up for herself.