Other relevant hadith:
“A Muslim should observe moderation in worship. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) is reported to have said: **"Do not overburden yourselves, lest you perish. People [before you] overburdened themselves and perished. Their remains are found in hermitages and monasteries."
This is also manifest in the well-known Hadith that states: **"Religion (Islam) is based on simplicity; and if a person wants to go to extremes in religion, he will find it difficult to do so."
As human beings, we are emotional creatures. We have the desire to express love and receive love. You can express love in words and you can express love in ACTIONS. In my opinion, you need a little bit of BOTH. And as the saying goes, "Actions speak LOUDER than words."
The Prophet SAWS encouraged his people to give gifts because gifts develop and maintain love and affection between people.
I do agree, that while it's wise to spend your money carefully (especially during a trying economy), it feels good to spend money on family and friends. It could be done through buying gifts, baking cookies for friends, preparing a nice meal for family, taking your spouse out to a fancy restaurant or holiday, or arranging a party/get-together for family and friends.
Our friends and family are a blessing to us......and giving gifts/treats whether its on Valentine's Day, a Wedding Anniversary, Graduation, Eid, or just some random day.......it's a way of showing you cherish and value your loved ones. And there's no waste of money in that!
So Gulab Jamun.....u should get used to receiving and giving gifts. Right now, it's only a flower from your sister-in-law. In the future you'll have to deal with the giving/receiving of gifts from your husband and in-laws, and kids.
You wouldn't be getting gifts if your friends/family didn't care about you. You seem to have a good heart Gulab Jamun.......so relax a bit, toss the ultra-practicality-no-nonsense away occasionally.......and engage in the joy of giving!