Finally! I am getting engaged to this amazing woman! Now since I’ve been in UK most my life I need some brushing up on pakistani customs (girl is from Pakistan - and for those of you wondering she’s 30 yrs old).
So - which side is responsible for which of the following events and how much money should I set aside for my part?
Nikka/Engagement
Shadi
Valima
Rukhsati
Mehndi/Dholki
???
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
congratulations. Hope it works out the best for you IA :)
btw just out of curiosity.. how old are you?
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
CONGRATS!!
I was hoping you were going to tell us that you bagged a 20 year old, but hey ho. :p
Oh, and I think your thread should be in the 'Wedding' section.
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
I bagged a youngin'
Off to see the wizard of Pak on Monday :D
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
Hes 37 - he wanted a young young 20 year old remember.
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
lol...how is she amazing?
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
I've never been able to keep it straight as to which side is responsible for which ceremony. But....Congratulation!!!!!! May Allah bless you with a happy and successful marriage, Amin :)
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
congratz!
you only need to manage valima.
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
lol...how is she amazing?
Well from my short interaction with her she seemed that way. After all the horror stories here, i hope she is like that. Just seemed very kind, caring, understanding and compromising sort.
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
^How long did you meet her for?
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
~~~ CONGRATZZZ*~~~*
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
Congratulations! I'm moving this to the appropriate forum! Best wishes!
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
congratulations 
shaadi- girl side
valima- boy side
mehndi- who ever is holding it
nikkah / engadgement- both 50/50
waise shaadi ke kharchey ke baarey mein mat socho but the after costs.. like gifts,flowers,honeymoon and more gifts 
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
The Nikkah and Ruksati functions are usually the responsibility of the bride's side
The Valima function is the responsibility of the groom's side
Mehndis are often joint these days or the bride's side does them. In few cases I've seen the groom's side do them.
Dholkis can be thrown by any close family and friends of the bride and groom.
The BARI is the responsibility of the groom's side. That includes heavy and fancy clothes for the bride. It almost always includes the valima jora, and depending on your family, it could also include the barat/shadi jora. For some reason the number of suits in the bari is usually an odd number, ranging from 7-15 usually. It often includes make up, perfumes, shoes, bangles, and other accessories for the clothes.
The JAHEZ is the responsibility of the bride's side. That includes a larger number of outfits, but few heavy ones. The bride's side MAY make the barat/shadi jora for the bride and make it part of the jahez. That depends on family customs and agreement between the families. The Jahez often includes household and personal items for the bride's use as well.
The mehndi clothes for the bride are usually made by the bride's side. The mehndi clothes for the groom are usually made by the groom's side.
In some families the groom makes his own shadi day clothes. In other families these are gifted from the bride's side. This is the same for the valima day clothes.
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
How lovely 
!
Hehe.
Congrats :k:
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
Finally! I am getting engaged to this amazing woman! Now since I've been in UK most my life I need some brushing up on pakistani customs (girl is from Pakistan - and for those of you wondering she's 30 yrs old).
So - which side is responsible for which of the following events and how much money should I set aside for my part?
Nikka/Engagement Shadi Valima Rukhsati Mehndi/Dholki
???
congrats.................. :)
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
Finally! I am getting engaged to this amazing woman! Now since I've been in UK most my life I need some brushing up on pakistani customs (girl is from Pakistan - and for those of you wondering she's 30 yrs old).
So - which side is responsible for which of the following events and how much money should I set aside for my part?
Nikka/Engagement Shadi Valima Rukhsati Mehndi/Dholki
???
hey... don forget to post ur wedding pics on GS :)
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
Congratu-ma-lations!
Very happy to hear this news and even better that you like her so much!
Good luck!
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
no no no you got all mixed up its ...
Valima/Engagement
Shadi
Rukhsati/Dholki
Nikka
Mehndi
Re: I am getting engaged! WOOOOOO!
Finally! I am getting engaged to this amazing woman! Now since I've been in UK most my life I need some brushing up on pakistani customs (girl is from Pakistan - and for those of you wondering she's 30 yrs old).
So - which side is responsible for which of the following events and how much money should I set aside for my part?
Nikka/Engagement Shadi Valima Rukhsati Mehndi/Dholki
???
nikkah/engagement = bride's side except for her clothes and stuff you arrange for that
rukhsati= bride's side (nikkah and rukhsati may be done on same day)
valima = guy;s side
mehndi = both
bari= gifts for the bride from the guy's side
jahez=gifts for the bride from the bride's side
ideally the engagement is just a small baat pakki type thing done at the bride's place
then mehndi cost is split between both sides
nikkah and rukhsati is arranged by bride
valima is all on the guy
i know of a family that did something different tho...the baat pakki was really informal where the guy's side went to the brides house when the brides side had agreed on the rishta and just exchanged mithaii
then they ended up splitting the cost for both the mehndi and the nikkah/rukhsati and then the guy paid for the valima ...this was done this way because the guy was against putting so much of a burden on the girls family
so it really depends on ur family