Re: Husband isn’t ready for children
You promised to wait 2-3 years to start trying…so your husband should not be surprised if you bring this up right after your 2nd anniversary (1 year from now). I can only imagine his shock when you brought up babies even before the 1st anniversary! And btw, have you discussed your fears with you GYN? He/She is familiar with your past/present medical history and should be able to put your mind at ease.
I think you need to wait a few months (2-3)…and then have a calm, practical discussion with your husband. Keep it focused on “US” and “WE”…versus “I” and “you”. Let him know that as discussed prior to your marriage…you would like to go off the pill on your 2nd anniversary. Ask him what BOTH of you can do in the next 8-10 months in order to prepare yourselves for TTC. This way he’s not pressured to trying TTC now, and realizes that you care about his comfort too.
Ask him what his specific concerns are in regards to having a baby. Is he worried about money? If so then how much money does he want to save up before TTC? Discuss who will take care of baby. Will you quit your job and be a stay-at-home mom? If so, can your husband’s current salary support you AND a baby? Do you plan on hiring a nanny/daycare? If so how much will that cost weekly/monthly? Do you have family members near by who can help? Do you already own a home? If not, then when do you two plan on buying a home and how does that figure into the baby plan?
I don’t know the specifics of your life but these are just some ideas I’m brainstorming. Point being talk to your husband about specific concerns he has and how BOTH of you can work together in addressing those concerns in the months leading up to your 2nd anniversary.
BTW, does your husband have any close friends who has children? How is he with your nieces/nephews when you babysit them? Or around other young children in general.