Re: Hurting feelings of others
Well, I don't know why do they do it, but following are some of the ways I have learned from scholars in dealing with such people.
1. The first ayah of Surah Fatah " Inna Fatahna laka fat'ham mubeenaa" acts like a spray for all the germs and insects around you that are trying to harm you because of jealousy, prejudice....etc or any other reason. Just read it whenever you come across them and see the wonders.
2. I asked a professor the reason why he is able to remain so patient when people try to hurt his feelings. He replied, " Whenever a person hurts my feelings, I don't hate him, because it was not his fault. That pain was written from me and had to reach me one way or the other, it is only that, "nature" selected that person as a source to convey that pain to me, which is actually a test for me. So, I forgive him for the love of Allah (swt)."
3. Do good to people (not at the cost of your major responsibilities) and expect only bad from them. We are mostly hurt by those people from whom we don't expect bad and they surprise us with their sudden negative behaviour.
4. I am sure that mashaAllah you would be among the very respected members of your family. Some people (with already bad reputation) would try to ruin your reputation by behaving in a negative manner (infront of others) so as to make you angry so that you may also respond in a negative way and they succeed in pulling you down to their level. But if you give absolutely no importance to their behaviour, ignore them completely and remain polite, then you would inshaAllah succeed in pulling them up to your level.
Recitation of following verses help a lot in such situations
5.
Chapter : 16 (Al-Nahl) Verse : 128 [Short Commentary]
And, O Prophet, endure thou with patience; and verily thy patience is possible only with the help of Allah. And grieve not for them, nor feel distressed because of their evil designs.
Chapter : 40 (Al-Mu'min) Verse : 56 [Short Commentary]
*So have patience. Surely, the promise of Allah is true. And ask forgiveness for them for the wrongs they have done thee and glorify thy Lord with His praise in the evening and the in morning. *
Chapter : 50 (Qaf) Verse : 40 [Short Commentary]
So bear with patience what they say, and celebrate the praises of thy Lord, before the rising of the sun and before its setting;
Chapter : 70 (Al-Ma`arij) Verse : 6 [Short Commentary]
So be patient with admirable patience.
6.
The person who recites soorah **Asr **in his/her recommened prayers will have a shining face on the day of judgement.
The one who recites soorah Asr will be in patient in adversity and will be **counted from among the people of truth. **
Translation:
1. By (the Token of) Time (through the ages),
Verily Man is in loss,
Except such as have Faith, and do righteous deeds, and (join together) in the mutual teaching of Truth, and of Patience and Constancy.