sorry if some guy and chic are necking and she says no to anything else, no is no. she can not be given the same punishment. or if the guy says no and is forced.. he can not be given the same punishment..necking and making out, although not allowed, are not the same as zina.
I also dont understand your statement of ‘can happen by force’ well of course, some sort of force or threat or drugging someone etc etc is the modus operendi ..