dear people,
From my childhood to 19 years of age, my life is affected by every single thing that happens to me or to the sorrounding… Even making decision about getting food from a cafe, or any other simple or a big decision, I think so much about the pros and cons of things that I end up getting confused and depressed…
people say that I am a confused personality and I have low self esteem… I am not a social person… I have few people in my university who I know and they know me(friends)… I forgot to mention that I am in my sophomore in the university… I am very shy at approaching at new people… I get extremely anxious and overwhelmed when around in groups of people or giving presentations and especially there are some women around… I belong to other city and I am living in a hostel here… its a single room with two other roommates…
I am not friends with them though.. formal with them…
So, what I wanted to know is that what can I do about my situation?!? How can I become reckless(in +ve way)?
please give any other advice than visiting a psychologist..
well. you dont have to be friends with everyone but need to have a friendly attitude. One of the best way is to be smile and say hi to people who u see very often. This gives the impression you arent very kharoos and you wudnt feel awkward if incase you need a favor from them.
Make a habit of making quick decisions. like give urself a time of few seconds and just decide away what you want( that stands for shopping or ordering a meal) but for bigger decisions in life ,give yourself time think rationally and decide.
It is not something somebody over the internet can tell you. Self actualization and the ability to musters ones own emotion does not come with internet chatting. It comes self confidence and general value of self. He is shy because he thinks at some level he doesn't fit in with these people. It a vicious circle.
And excuse you missy, my job is not to be helpful. My job is to be a troll. Regardless of what you wish me to be :p
Indeed, self actualization (easy tiger, big words must be hurting your pretty little head :P) does not come from internet chatting. Internet chatting, may be helpful in teaching he/she to express themselves better though. Which is a start.
You're a troll who sometimes forgets to be a troll, which makes you a lousy troll.
I am sorry but the internet is not a replacement for real life regardless of what the weirdos on GS think :D If he is shy he has to figure out why he is shy. If he feels anxious he has to ask why himself why he is anxious. Confidence should be in place by the time your finish college. It is in fact where you find out if you are a man our a mouse. He has two years to figure that out.
One thing he can learn right away is simple. Respect yourself and others will respect you. Have confidence in yourself and others will have confidence in you.
He needs to figure out what has lead to his under-confidence. Once he knows what his problems are others like you ms goody two shoes can consider him a pet project. It starts with him. Not on the internet.
The fact that he will listen to all you have to say and accept it is simply part of his problem and not his solution.
That 's u think u have a confused personality but its not like that in this world 16 types of personalities exists if you want to know about ur personality u may try Myers Briggs Personality Type Identifier i think it will help u and solve ur problem u may try this search on Google u may find the test with the instruction i hope it will help u
i was quite strong person and now i have grown to be a HSP person due to many adverse conditions in my life that really affected my life bad real bad,
both ways i ws never shy or never an anti social person.
yes gupshup served alot thru my saddest times of life or you can say the worst times of my life and i faced those things which i never even imagined that i would be able or which just killed me almost .
I used to be pretty shy too. You’re 19, you’re not supposed to have figured out the world by now. I came from Pakistan to New York with two suitcases, about to start college. Ofcourse there was trepidation mixed with the excitement of a new life. It’s kind of a new slate, right. The only baggage you have is your baggage. My roommates turned out to be gits as well in the beginning, but I overcame that my making friends outside of that, and through courses. Eventually things with the roommates improved as well. Think of it as an exciting time for yourself. Say hi to someome in class, in your dorm, or join up with a social group in which you have an interest. Remember, your biggest opponent is yourself. So, give yourself a quick kick in the arse and tell yourself you can do it, and it’s gonna be a lot of fun. Good luck!!
My roommates turned out to be gits as well in the beginning, but I overcame that my making friends outside of that, and through courses. Eventually things with the roommates improved as well. Think of it as an exciting time for yourself. Say hi to someome in class, in your dorm, or join up with a social group in which you have an interest. Remember, your biggest opponent is yourself. So, give yourself a quick kick in the arse and tell yourself you can do it, and it’s gonna be a lot of fun. Good luck!!