Re: How would you see this?
You can't.
You simply can't. Marriage is a gamble and a risk. You can do your best to minimize the risk by finding out as much as you can but there is no way to eliminate it completely. This is where your faith comes in.
In our culture, we do not date. When you do not date, you do not have the option of finding out anything concrete about the person's character or personality. You have to rely on what is on paper or what you are told. That's just how it is. You do your best by talking to people and finding out about who they are from their peers.
In my opinion, the best route is to do istikhara and put your faith in Allah.
You have to understand one thing: a set up is not good. As someone who has been through this rishta process a bazillion times, its not good. Setting someone up for failure and then considering that failure a character flaw is not going to give you any information. It will however have you starting from scratch a million times because again...he is not obligated towards you. There is no reason for him to bypass any opportunities right now.
Makes sense. Thanks.