Re: how would a clever DIL behave while shes living with the inlaws...
^ I do agree that it takes a lot more courage and strength to stay quiet and let things go. It's easy to lose control and lash out. And strangely people think that silence is a sign of weakness. On the contrary, silence can be golden.
^** BUT** up to a certain point. There's a limit for everything. It's okay to let go of minor slip-ups and tactlessness. But if the other person has REALLY CROSSED OVER THE LINE **(bad-mouthing your family, spreading rumors about you, making false accusations, and jeopardizing your reputation as well as your marriage).....then it calls for some **communication. And you can communicate your views with "class" *without resorting to disrespect and stooping to the other person's level. I believe that sometimes (not always) you can make a person realize their errors through civil discussion....and you gotta go beyond *"jee, jee, haan jee" for that. Help educate the imbecile, lol ;)