How true is this?

[Sara516]

Re: How true is this?

@TLK

first of all, if many people are saying the same thing about me, its something wrong with me most probably, not them.

second thing is, that if I correct myself then its not to please them but to make myself better.

When I said that there’s something wrong with them I guess I meant the attitude that some people had in saying something…theres a difference between having constructive criticism as opposed to just being mean about it.

For ex/ saying something like… “you should lose weight becuase it will help you feel better about yourself” puts the focus on how that person will feel… as opposed to “you should lose weight because no one will like you or find you attractive” which (IMO) shows your own insecurities as a person? I guess that’s what I"m tryign to say…weight loss is just one example.

@canadiandesigirl

I agree with TLK, if the change is beneficial for you and if its something many people have pointed maybe there is some truth to it. Don’t change your likes or dislikes for others. If its for example wt loss, that’s for ones own good and better health. So it comes down to what those changes are and how are those changes affecting the person themselves.

Yeah BUT let’s say a person is at a healthy weight or just happy with the way they are, they don’t want to diet and exercise…should they do so just because so and so tells them to? I remember someone here was talking about how people are always telling her to get braces to fix her teeth…and she didn’t want to, as she felt she’d be doing it “for them.”
Anyways, there’s many other examples I’m sure…but my point was the difference between the two thoughts I guess… one is all about doing something for yourself and changing to please yourself…while the other is, doing something that you would likely not do, and don’t enjoy doing, just to pleas e someone else.