well, last 2 days i havent been as in his face as i am and yes he noticed, in fact he notced alot and keeps asking kya hua, thing is s soon as im normal again, hel be back to his normalagain......i dont wish for him not to care for his mum, but he could show the same concern for me, ok so im not ill, but im preg, and if i say i feel sick or something, i would like him to run to me with a bucket not look at me blankly for 20 seconds and then ask acha koi baat nahi.....nd revert back to playstation......grrrrrrrrrrrrrr of course there are times he does show care, but mostly its acha koi baat nahi wala scene....
Okay, when you avoid being in his face...if you do it in a sulky manner...he's going to ask "kya hua" because he sees it as more of a cold shoulder. I don't see that as "missing You"....it seems more like "OH GREAT..she's mad at me and I better figure out what it is." What I mean by giving him space is to keep yourself occupied with activities that you would enjoy....as opposed to avoiding him in a sulky way. Don't be glued to him. Do something you'd enjoy..so that you're not spending the time being angry and curious about when he's going to come over. I don't think he's going to ask "kya hua?" if he sees that you're doing fine/being happy without him....I think that's more likely to make him miss you.....but then again that shouldn't be the sole purpose it, Nadz. You had interests before he ever entered your life....what happened to those. Try cooking a diff/new recipe, watch a movie, read a book, learn to knit, learn to sew, paint, etc. Do something that you're interested in, that would be productive and that you'd enjoy.....don't just disappear in a pissy mood waiting for him to notice. He can pick up on that. Frequent negativity repels people...positivity attracts them.
I dunno...play the playstation...when he's not around. Improve your skills and then play with him. That could be fun and bring you guys closer.
actually RV, im not doing it in a sulky way at all, i just did my own thing, didnt throw myself in his face as soon as he walks into the room, just carried on reading my book/watchn tv/cleaning cooking or whatever i was doing......im still talking to him normally, just not demanding his time or being all lovey dovey and ive seen that today he was all lovey-dovey while i was reading my book. no sulking. the difference is with women and men, or me and him, he has a cough, which he hasnt said he has but i can hear him coughing away, so il go make him a hot drink or something for it, while if i have a cough i have to TELL HIM and MAKE HIM make me a hot drink...thats the scene usualy
the difference is with women and men, or me and him, he has a cough, which he hasnt said he has but i can hear him coughing away, so il go make him a hot drink or something for it, while if i have a cough i have to TELL HIM and MAKE HIM make me a hot drink...thats the scene usualy
nadz seems to me like you are a reasonable person so try this
take him out to dinner, just the two of you
well, last 2 days i havent been as in his face as i am and yes he noticed, in fact he notced alot and keeps asking kya hua, thing is s soon as im normal again, hel be back to his normalagain......i dont wish for him not to care for his mum, but he could show the same concern for me, ok so im not ill, but im preg, and if i say i feel sick or something, i would like him to run to me with a bucket not look at me blankly for 20 seconds and then ask acha koi baat nahi.....nd revert back to playstation......grrrrrrrrrrrrrr of course there are times he does show care, but mostly its acha koi baat nahi wala scene....
there will be a rift in your marriage of you start thinking like this
marriages based on equality are also very rare to find and almost impossible to have
if you think i make him 10 cups of coffee a week, then he should make ten cups of coffee for me as well, then you will get more no where. in fact you will start going apart from him. there is no harm in doing a little bit more than your spouse in marriage. after all he is your husband you will be growing old with him. i have seen very loving wives caring for their husbands 24/7 while husbands working 24/7 just to provide. anyway, there is a equilibrium that is established. seek and accept equilibrium rather than revolt
actually RV, im not doing it in a sulky way at all, i just did my own thing, didnt throw myself in his face as soon as he walks into the room, just carried on reading my book/watchn tv/cleaning cooking or whatever i was doing......im still talking to him normally, just not demanding his time or being all lovey dovey and ive seen that today he was all lovey-dovey while i was reading my book. no sulking. the difference is with women and men, or me and him, he has a cough, which he hasnt said he has but i can hear him coughing away, so il go make him a hot drink or something for it, while if i have a cough i have to TELL HIM and MAKE HIM make me a hot drink...thats the scene usualy
Im new to this forum. I just wanted to say that i can relate to you totally. I find myself in the same position. My husband was so nice before we got married. like he was so caring and would always tell me that he would be such a good husband. i bought into everything he said. Now its been 2 years since we got married and he has just changed so much. Like when he is at work he never calls me, but he calls his family up all the time. When i am ill he never asks how i am feeling or doesnt have the initiative to go out and buy me medicine. When his sister was ill he sent her medicine from here and was just so worried about her. I thought after kids he mite change but he has not. I have a son and I am pregnant again, he still does not seem to care. He never asks me how i am feeling. It really hurts me because he was so nice before. I really miss the old him. Sometimes i wish i never spoke to before marriage because then i would not have missed the old him, i would have just accepted the way he is. i feel so sad and depressed all the time. he doesnt even talk to me much, just comes home, goes out with friends, comes back, eats and sleeps. its like everyday is the same. i wish sometimes i was not married, i was so much happier before, had no worries, has a good social life and now im just depressed. i wish he would change because i really do love him.
actually RV, im not doing it in a sulky way at all, i just did my own thing, didnt throw myself in his face as soon as he walks into the room, just carried on reading my book/watchn tv/cleaning cooking or whatever i was doing......im still talking to him normally, just not demanding his time or being all lovey dovey and ive seen that today he was all lovey-dovey while i was reading my book. no sulking. the difference is with women and men, or me and him, he has a cough, which he hasnt said he has but i can hear him coughing away, so il go make him a hot drink or something for it, while if i have a cough i have to TELL HIM and MAKE HIM make me a hot drink...thats the scene usualy
Its a difference between men & women overall. You should read the book "men are from mars, women from venus"; its truly going to help some one in a situation like you.
