How To Shower Like A Woman
-
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry basket according to
lights and darks. -
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your husband along
the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom. -
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out your gut so that
you can complain and whine even more about how you’re getting fat. -
Get in the shower. Look for facecloth, armcloth, legcloth, long loofah, wide
loofah and pumice stone. -
Wash your hair once with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.
-
Wash your hair again with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added
vitamins. -
Condition your hair with Cucumber and Lamfrey conditioner enhanced with
natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes. -
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red
raw. -
Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body wash.
-
Rinse conditioner off hair (this takes at least fifteen minutes as you must
make sure that it has all come off). -
Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it
waxed instead. -
Scream loudly when your husband flushes the toilet and you freeze / roast
-
Turn off shower.
-
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mould spots with Mould and
Mildew Remover. -
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small African Country. Wrap
hair in super absorbent second towel. -
Check entire body for the remotest sign of a blemish. Attack with
nails/tweezers/stanley knife/sander/power drill if found. -
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
-
If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas and then
rush to bedroom to spend an hour and a half getting dressed.
hummay tum say pyar kitna :)yae hum nahe jantay:)