So umm my parents have found this young girl for me to marry. She's like 19. So umm wanted to ask the older people here on some tips to keep a desi wife under control so that she could respect my parents and be obediant to me. Please advice.
Respect is a two way street. You give respect to earn respect.
You have to specify what kind of control you want to exert on your wife. Then apply the same rules to your own siblings and see how you feel about that. It is not necessary that you will able to observe faults in your own thought process, because upbringing, environment and education (or lack of it) are major disabling factors.
Usually, birds of feather flock together. If you have this thinking, then I am pretty sure your fiancee's family will have the same control issues. Just reckon where you are heading to.
Without any disrespect, one solution for you will be to marry a relatively poor and uneducated girl who has severe inferiority complex issues. She will definitely fit your need. Only this way both parties can be happy.
beast?? wow, you’re off to a good start! NOT. even figuratively, referring to your future life-partner as a “beast” is in bad taste
so the advice you’re seeking would be this-- figure out who she is and what she needs to keep her happy. do all the things that make her happy. involve her in your life. show her the things that are important to you and go from there.
i’ll bet you she willingly does things to make you happy too because she wants to, and not because you’re forcing her to, but because you make her so happy.
marriage is mutual give and take, not just take from your side and no give in return. she’s leaving her family to join yours… as your wife and as your equal, not as your servant. treat her with respect and love, and she’ll return the feelings.
Well being sensitive to her needs and demands defeats the whole purpose of this exercise. I mean what if her needs/demand conflict with what I want? I somehow want to have my cake and wat it too.
If it's only about your needs, why not get a prostitute to fulfill those immediate ones, a maid to clean the house, and a nurse to take care of you and your parents.
You don't want marriage, you want servants. Don't confuse the two.
Marriage is a partnership, guy. NOT a master/slave relationship. You arent looking for a partner to share life with, you're looking for a slave. Not many women (if any) would remain happy in that kind of situation so you'll find yourself wifeless in the end anyway. Better to put off the whole wife idea and hire the type of servants you "need".
^ Unfortunately, many men with the same expectations don't find themselves wifeless, because the women they marry have been so subdued and abused, that they continue to think they are at fault for any of the problems they are having, and that they need to continue sacrificing their happiness and self-worth for a bunch of pigs.
^ Unfortunately, many men with the same expectations don't find themselves wifeless, because the women they marry have been so subdued and abused, that they continue to think they are at fault for any of the problems they are having, and that they need to continue sacrificing their happiness and self-worth for a bunch of pigs.
If it's only about your needs, why not get a prostitute to fulfill those immediate ones, a maid to clean the house, and a nurse to take care of you and your parents.
That's an interesting insight, never heard of such an arrangement. Your role as a prosititue for your husband? Nice.
JRG, you definitely are not ready to marry....your disgust, disregard and mistrust of women is very apparent. I hope you are very young, like 15 or 16 and far from marriage....you aint ready for it - you see women as the enemy rather than a potential life partner and you're looking to be waited upon like you're some kinda king....ARE you??? I guess if you ARE a king and can supply all the frills and benefits of such to your wife then she may be more willing to "obey". Be prepared to supply sable, emeralds and diamonds.
That's an interesting insight, never heard of such an arrangement. Your role as a prosititue for your husband? Nice.
I would get angry, except that I can tell this is a fake thread.
I am however annoyed.
At least read.
As I said, you are confusing servitude for marriage. What you are asking for is servants. I am not in the kind of relationship that you seem to desire, so the suggestion I offered for you does not apply for me. It's a special for materialistic, thick-headed, narrow-minded, egotistical, small, douche-bags.
This is the kind of thread that a pre-teen or young teen would write....he needs to learn and grow and IN shallah he will. Horrors otherwise!! And if thats the case man I SO wish him a wife with a brain that will turn his arse around and show him whats what. Like I always say, marriage is a partnership or it aint gonna work.
