Re: How to get over my lost wedding tape
A lot seems to be bothering you about your wedding, 6ish years ago. I think these threads that you're starting about the smaller details of the wedding are symptoms of a larger unhappiness about the wedding. From your other thread, I see your sister is getting married, and it's probably reviving all of these feelings or even creating them -- did you even know that you wanted some of this stuff until your sister got it?
Recognize the fact that a lot of things did not go as you would have liked for your wedding, and also that a lot has changed in these past few years. Even your family circumstances have probably changed. You have changed. You aren't the bride from 6-7 years ago; but you can celebrate who you are today. Rather than being depressed about what you can't change, have a lot of fun and do things on your terms now. If you aren't willing to do that, the situation is not going to be better.