Re: how to deal with disliking father in law..
Hmm…okay, so you say he’s super chill…that’s a good thing. UNLESS…maybe he was somehow trying to give a hint about the late night talks? Are you sure he doesn’t find it disturbing in any way…in terms of it getting in the way of sleep, phone bills, etc? Or maybe it’s an assumption on your part that he would know how your parents will respond to/view EVERY single issue? What I mean is…he may know that your parents in general are more conservative than him…but he might have assumed that it was no big deal for him to mention this to your parents…since it’s a merging of two families and there’s nothing shameful about it.
I mean you’ve grown up in a conservative family…and you yourself are saying “well duh…what’s the big deal…we live so far away from one another…how else are we supposed to talk?” So, if you can see the logic in the situation, despite the conservative upbringing… is there a possibility that maybe your parents are over-reacting? That’s another way to consider the matter as well, isn’t it? What is the “gunnah” in what your FIL said to your parents? It’s not the worst thing in the world. He may even have said it with the intention that he finds it cute that you guys talk often. I would think that it’s a “no brainer” or common knowledge to most parents that the a couple will talk during the engagement period …unless the family is uber-conservative and doesn’t believe in such interactions before marriage.
I’m not attacking your parents, I’m just putting another perspective out there for you. If your parents think it’s a “shameful/inappropriate” for your FIL to make these comments to them…then they shouldn’t even be okay with you talking to your “fiance” until after your marry him. It’s almost like words are more offensive than actions?