esp, when your as religious as an atheist…sorry bit extreme, but my husband wants us to create a religious mahol, especially if we be living the SATANIC WEST, ( hes paranoid), and wants this kind of environment esp from me. as im the mother of our 2 girls.now problem is.,IM NOT RELIGIOUS.yes i believe in islam, i am muslim. etc etc. but namaz…- dont do it, ramadan-hardly did it- etc etc , and i have no fear…i pray that Allah gives the hadayat soon, to atleast pray namaz, but so far, im zilch. i wish i was more religious. and ive spoken to hubby and told him im trying but namaz to me is like a chore for me. once i complete it, im relieved of it…yet i do believe in it. hes supprtive, but he cant make me do it. i need to. so any advice…i dnt want my girls growing up without religion, i dnt want to be a too-liberalised mum.
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
There is only one way to create religious environment and that is by example. There is no other way.
can I go a bit hard on you nadz? I just fail to understand how one person can believe on something and yet dont do it.
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
Having kids and then wanting to raise them in a religious way,should be an incentive enough if nothing else hasn't been before...no...??
As D6C said it can only be achieved by setting up an example at home first.All the best..!
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
There seems to be a lack of Islamic knowledge. I would suggest that you go and read up about Islam/listen to lectures, etc. Try reading the translation of the Quran because if that doesn't get you following the religion like it should be followed, then I don't know what will.
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
There is only one way to create religious environment and that is by example. There is no other way.can I go a bit hard on you nadz? I just fail to understand how one person can believe on something and yet dont do it.
your right.maybe im conditioned to believe. i mean, alot of us dont do what islam says, yet we muslim right. i dont know. please tell me. i want to create an example. however i lack fear and religion itself in my heart. its just words.
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
How about starting with reading some Islamic books and as Disney said reading the translation of Quran. Most of us (including myself) read the quean in Arabic at first and do not understand the true teachings unless we read the Tafseer or Translation.
If at first its hard for you to take time out to read books because you have 2 kids, you can get the Quran CDs (with translation) and play it while you are taking care of other chores
2ndly, how about starting Namaz. No one can go from 0 to 5 Namaz all of a sudden but do as many as you can.
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
Tell your husband to join gs and start posting in religious forum and then discuss with the whole family.
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
I know where nadz is coming from. I used to have similar concerns.
When my wife and I got married, both of us were not super religious. I always believed in Allah and that the teachings of Allah are to be obeyed, but for reasons I now don’t even understand myself I could never get myself to pray regularly. I didn’t like it when Tableeghi kind people pushed me to start praying. That just didn’t work for me, because I feel that understanding has to come from within and not because somebody asks you to do it. It kind of felt weird to me to pray when other people were present. I was afraid of them thinking “barra religious bann raha hai”. Now I wonder why I ever thought like this because I should have been concerned about what Allah thinks and not what other people think. But I did have those thoughts back then.
The only prayer I was trying to be regular about was Jumma Namaz every Friday and even that I missed out on sometimes. I was however very particular about fasting in Ramadan ever since I can remember. Pretty much the same situation for my wife. She prayed on and off just like I did. She used to keep a Dupatta around her neck but wouldn’t cover her hair when going out. This whole scenario remained unchanged even after our son was born.
What really changed things for me was one particular situation during a business meeting in Dubai. The person I was meeting with (Jordanian Muslim) excused himself after a while and said he is going downstairs to the prayer room for Namaz. He did NOT directly ask me to go with him and pray. Instead he said “You can wait here in the meeting room for a few minutes until I get back or get a coffee if you like.” (I can’t remember the exact words but it was something along these lines.) And at that point I had an incredible feeling of shame. I told him that I’m gonna join him, went to the prayer room with him, prayed in a Jamaat with him and since that day I have been praying 5 times a day 
. Where so many Tableeghis who kept asking me to pray had failed, one guy who did NOT ask me to pray changed my life and did not even notice. To this date he does not know that the situation had that kind of impact on me.
After getting back from that trip I continued praying regularly, but did not really ask my wife to do the same. She obviously noticed the change though. Since the Tableeghi tactics had never worked on me, I knew they wouldn’t work on her either. And I was right. After a couple of weeks my wife also started to pray regularly without me saying anything. A few weeks later we decided to go for Hajj that year. And since then my wife wears the Hijab.
What I actually wanted to say with this message is:
[ul]
[li]Just because you are not religious now, doesn’t mean you never will be.[/li][li]Don’t let anyone “force” you to be religious. When the time comes, it will happen automatically.[/li][LIST]
[li]Because of my own experience I am very sceptical of Tableeghis. I am seen as one of the more religious people in my circle of friends, but would argue against Tableeghi Jamaat when we discuss the topic. Some people find that very odd.[/li][/ul]
[li]“Creating a religious environment” does not guarantee that the kids will be religious. Neither does a non-religious environment guarantee that they will not.[/li][/LIST]
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
Build your relationship
With Allah swt. Get to know Him and His bounties... That's where it starts from, a seed of love for your creator multiplies into floods of gratitude .. A relationship which cannot compare to anything . Then slowly everything will make sense...
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
i did try reading the quran in english. have it on my Kindle. lost interest. : ANDthe words are just words to me.
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
Hey Nadz
Probably like a lot of people I have read a lot of your threads, but I have always felt like people on gs are always being incredibly unfair to you by not ‘being on your side’ so to speak whenever you are venting about a problem. Just to let you know, whenever I have read your posts, I have felt nothing but empathy for you, so I am on your side lol:)
I can understand your concerns about creating a religious home when you dont feel that you are that religious yourself, I myself am engaged and have had similiar concerns about whether me and my fiance are on the same wavelength about namaaz etc, because Alhumdulihah I pray 5 times a day, and I have never actualy asked my fiance out right if he does lol, ( i think he does pray, but I didnt want to sound judgemental and pushy ( and make myself sound high & mighty) by asking him “yo, do you pray or not!!” lol.
However, although I pray now, there was a time when I didnt pray all the time, I am in my early twenties, and when I was a kid and in my teens, I wasn’t in the habit of praying. I live in the UK as well. I can say though, that I think praying has a definite impact on how you live your life. I can say this by comparing to my cousins in my family who dont pray, and our viewpoints and opinions on life are extremley different. Things like dressing in revealing clothes, clubbing and drinking, I have seen happen, but me personally I have never had any interest in that, and I think that this down to my upbringing but also the guidance and comfort I get from praying. So I think that praying will definitley help in raising your kids in the right way and giving your husband piece of mind, but it needs to come from the parents as well to be effective.
**I can relate to you **as you say that you dont pray, as I didnt used to pray as often as I do now when I was younger, and you say you feel like its a chore, so try this : think of a problem you are having, or something you need guidance with, and start by praying and then following the namaaz with a dua asking Allah (SWT) for help with whatever problem you are having) Trust Allah (SWT) and ask Him for help, forgiveness, whatever you want. The fact that you are willing to open yourself up to namaaz and religion shows that you do feel religion is important, and Allah (SWT) is always willing to help those who want it (InshaAllah). Islam & namaaz isnt just about fear - it is about getting support, guidance, peace ( and for me lots of comfort) in your life. So the fact that you dont have fear, I wouldnt worry about - in fact I think its probably a good thing, its not just about fear.
Try small and pray a little at first, asking Allah (SWT) for help, (and praying more often will gradually get easier and InshaAllah you will fall into the routine eventually) InshaALLah, you will get what you are looking for and** trust me the schedule of praying 5 times a day definitely gets easier , so the whole feeling like a chore thing doesnt last. **Good Luck 
(and give it a try! - because religion does help growing up in the UK to stay true to your beliefs and not succumb to peer pressure and do inappropriate things)
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
^Start with lectures. Personally I find Nouman Ali Khan and Sheikh Yasir Qadhi really good. Especially Nouman Ali Khan uses loads of references from Quran when discussing a subject. He also have a website (Bayyinah Tv - just google it) where you can listen to tafseer of Quran. Reading the Quran in english will only help you very little, you need to back that up with Tafseer.
I actually understand your husband. If you're not religious and have no connection to Islam apart from being born in it, I understand he is worried about the future of his daughters. Living in the west, where Islam is being criticized left and right, its very important for children to have a solid foundation from home, if that also is lacking, it can be very hard for the individual to follow the right path.
how to create a religious environment in your home.
First try to pray five times a day,if possible with ur gals(even if it feels as a burden)first u grip Namaz then Namaz will grip your attention towards Allah subhanaotallah inshahAllah...keep a tasbih with u when you'r free recite Surah e Fatiha,and also read its meanings so u can relate to Wht ur saying...inshahAllah Allah will guide u to Sirat e Mustaqeem...when you find the depth in ur Prayers n Namaz then assume ur doing a gud job:) but remember u need to change ur self first. Sis if u want some change in ur environment :)
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
You don't know how much at peace you'll be if you start praying ... Namaz is one of our 5 pillars. It is a MUST for every muslim. There is no maafi for not reading namaz.
I do not blame your husband for having these basic demands from you. How can you "believe" in it but not do it? Sorry Nadz, but you should start praying namaz and start fasting during ramadan, agar tum nahi karogi to aage tumhare bache bhi nahi karenge.
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
Nadz: do little but constant and continuous. Allah appreciates consistency. You can try to regular to one prayer, and time will come that you willingly start praying seond, thrid and so on..
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
I agree with Wendy.. and namaz only brings discipline in your life and inner peace. Initially it would seem as a chore. It does to everybody at some point in time. But yes let's remember it is one of the MOST important task we should be doing and that too 5 times a day. Once you'll get into a habit, you would feel really bad on missing a namaz.
It's also the easiest solution to ones depressions and misery.
When my little one was born, my husband used to emphasise on praying together in front of him and inwardly I thought, what's the point. He's just about 2 months old. What would he know! But we both did this. Would keep him by our side while we were on the prayer mat. And MA now at 8 months old, when he sees me wearing a dupatta ready for namaz he has a big smile on his face and he stays quiet throughout and doesnt whine or cry coz he's used to it .
Children only learn if they see us doing things. Half hearted msgs and *naseehat *are my pet peeves too. How do I expect little kids then to listen and agree to them.
Send your husband my way. I'll teach him how to fix ya!
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
What I find disheartening is that my most religious uncle and aunt, the ones who took their son to the mosque regularly in the West, the ones who made sure he did all of his prayers while growing up, the ones who did the most to set an Islamic example for him.... have the only son in the family who goes out drinking, who doesn't pray to the extent that when the rest of my cousins do jamaat he sits in the corner and browses his phone (if an adult comes, he gets up and pretends to go through the motions of namaaz) , the only son who pretends to fast in Ramadan in front of his elders but eats and drinks when they are not there, and a myriad of other major sins.
To be fair, their daughter turned out to be conservative in her values and a practicing muslimah.
But it still gives me a pause for thought when I consider that the most overtly religious household in my family produced the least religious son.
Re: how to create a religious environment in your home.
Send your husband my way. I'll teach him how to fix ya!
And where shall we send you to teach you to be nice to others?
First things first. Let’s get done with Nadz’s problem first.