Re: how should i respond...
i think it's hightime that your husband realize for whom he is doing all this work, aur kis kay liye woh itna busy hai. i mean, who exactly is he earning all this money for, if he isn't going to take care of his own family, in an emotional way. theek hai, mard ka kaam hai family ko support karna, laikin if he's not available to take you our his own daughter to a doctor for even regular check ups, then he is failing as a husband and a father. all he is really is a paycheck.
you need to confide in your husband. you need to make him realize what a dire situation your little girl is in. because he will really miss out on everything, and it's a life experience that everyone has to have. your saas sounds like she is from the past, no offence intended, and that's ok. that's what she was taught. but things have changed so much. and especially considering your daughter's health, he needs to be told about what is happening behind the scenes with things back home.
as for your saas, in a respectful manner, tell her that i'm sorry, my daughter's sick. i can't help it, and you know it as well. aap bhallay logon ko details main na batain keh bachi kitni beemar hai, but please do not stress me out even more considering the situation.