my sister doesnot want to get married and so every time she throws a tantrum (big one) when a family comes to see her .my mother gets very hurt and depressed cuz she acts very harsh . she has made it clear to our mom about this topic but as usual mom is still trying ,so now there is a rishtay waley coming to see her next week and mom asked me to talk to her and make her behave . hoe should i handle her??? plz help
Re: how should i handle this situation wid my sister?
I think you have to search for the root cause of the problem. Ask her why she does not want to get married ?
May be she does not like to dress up and being shown to larkay walay . Many many girls finds this proces very torturous and it is because no body likes to be rejected and most of the times the rejection is based upon looks /physical appearance of the girl. Sadly the guys have the first right of refusal and many girls feel quite insecure because of this. May be your sister has something in her appearance that she does not like and she does not feel comfortable in meeting the guy's family because she knows that she will be evaluated.
The above is just my guess there could be some other reason too you and your mom need to talk this with her without being angry or harsh. It is her life and she should really not be forced into marriage when she does not want to. It is a matter of her life time . You can not simply impose marriage on anyone. Your mom should not force marriage on her she is a living breathing human and her issues needs to be addressed.
Re: how should i handle this situation wid my sister?
Rishta tantrums can be because of many reasons, diamond321 has listed some of them. One major cause can be she being interested in someone else and because she couldn't talk to you guys on this matter, the only way she feels is to get rid with potential rishta's is throw a big tantrum. And trust me if this the reason, this is the only way considered effective by girls. Talk to her about it, ask her the reason? Give her options and maybe she'll speak up!
Best of luck!
Re: how should i handle this situation wid my sister?
Tell your mom she doesn't wanna get married so lay off the rishta stuff. Tell her you wanna get married so get you married off.
Re: how should i handle this situation wid my sister?
she is seeing someone..
Re: how should i handle this situation wid my sister?
You should talk to your sister and try to know the real reason for her behaviour... Is it that she likes to get married somewhere in particular? Is it that she does not like the process of rishtas? Is it that she wants to study more and make her career first? Is it that she does not want to get married AT ALL?
You must talk to her and ask her to tell you the real reason and only then you can help her... I know a few girls who does not want to get married and are happy in their career and professions... May be they will change their mind in the future when they get proposed by a good person.. who knows... but at the moment, their families have decided better not to force them after obviously trying for like years...
Re: how should i handle this situation wid my sister?
Maybe your Mum should hold off the rishta waley until your sister is confident about seeing them. You can't force her into something as it will probably make things worse.
Obviously there is a reason why she's not happy and you have to find out what it is. Put confidence into your sister that she can confide in you. If she doesn't want to tell you or doesn't give you a good reason about why she does not want to get married - then give her some space. Maybe she needs some time to sort something out herself.
But I think the best thing would be to get her to confide in you. There is obviously something troubling her.
Re: how should i handle this situation wid my sister?
i have to agree with Nomi....if this was my sister/cousin....first reaction she has someone in mind hence the tantrums....
how old is she?
Re: how should i handle this situation wid my sister?
maybe she just isn't ready to get married, how old is she?
Re: how should i handle this situation wid my sister?
Obviously, there is an important reason behind this tantrum and you need to find out...