Re: how scared do guys get, when…
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Re: how scared do guys get, when...
How much has the guy told his father? He can show him your picture and tell his father he likes you but he can also say he doesnt know you THAT well. Meaning, he knows of you through friends and the relationship is not so informal that you can speak to his father directly. Kwim?
Also, why does his dad want to talk to you before he speaks to your father?
So far, all his brothers have gone back home to get married. If this works out inshAllah, I’d be the first daughter-in-law who was raised in the West. I think his dad wanted to speak to me to check if I could speak Urdu, my way of speaking, i.e. how respectful I am, etc.
Aside from that, I like your suggestion - we spoke about this again and haven’t really come up with anything solid yet. He thinks I am making it a lot more complicated than necessary.
Re: how scared do guys get, when...
No, you're not at all. You're trying to make sure both sides of the family are as comfortable and happy as possible. That is smart as you dont want any issues to come up later.
Make it seem as if you guys know OF each other but dont know each other directly. So, in your FIL's eyes, your izzat is still preserved and he doesnt see you any different from his other DILs. The formality needs to stay in place so you can be considered no different from any of his other DILs that are from Pak.