[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Baba G: *
OR they have been there and done that.. and don't give a rodent's posterior no more..
[/QUOTE]
and what is stopping them from starting a different topic?
Typically, other than the inherent personality traits - whether you are a 'talker' or a 'listener' or whether you'd be the first to strike conversation or wait for the other person to take the initiative - it also depends on how much exposure you have in life. When students, some folks are totally nerdy and will not be able to utter a single sentence without fumbling or fidgeting... some years down their career paths and having to meet many people every day, they transform into pretty acceptable social talkers.
It also depends on how knowledgable you are. Many people stay quiet cz they have no clue on how to participate in an on-going discussion or feel they have nothing to add. Some others would chip-in regardless of the variety of topics. Some of these are natural traits, some you pick up as you go along.
Long story short... its not really something to cherish if you feel you are an introvert, who'd rather stay in a corner, rather than mingle with everyone in the middle. People like to talk with people, and its best if you are the sort of person whom people enjoy talking to and listening to. :-)
usually i'm very quiet. I take quite some time for myself to get a good image of the person i'm with. after some time, after i've made a clear profile of that person (his/her traits, good points, bad points, weak points) I open up a bit. Usually i'm quite talkative then
**"Modesty and emaan (faith) are companions; if one of them is removed, the other is removed. " [al-Hakim]
In another hadith he (sallallahu 3layhi wa sallam) said: “And modesty is a branch of faith.”
"Every religion has a distinct call. For Islam it is haya." [Ibn Majah].
"Modesty is a part of faith and faith leads to Paradise. Obscenity is a part of
indecency and indecency leads to the Fire.”[Ahmad]
Abu Mas’ood, Uqbah ibn Amr Al Ansari, quotes the Prophet (sallallahu 3layhi wa sallam) as saying:
"From what people have understood from the speech of the first prophethood is; ‘If
you feel no shynnss, then do as you wish.’”
[Related by Al-Bukhari, Abu Dawood, Ibn Majah, Ahmad and others].
Abdullah ibn Umar reports that Allah’s Messenger (sallallahu 3layhi wa sallam) passed by a man who was blaming his brother for being too shy.
The Prophet (sallallahu 3layhi wa sallam) said to him: “Leave him alone. To have a sense of shame is a quality of faith.”
(Related by Al-Bukhari. Muslim, At-Tirmithi and others).
The Prophet (sallallahu 3layhi wa sallam) said: "Haya and Trustworthiness will be the first to go from this world; therefor keep asking Allah for them." [Baihaqi]
Narrated on the authority of Anas bin Malik, the Prophet (saw) said: When lewdness is a part of anything, it becomes defective; and when haya is a part of anything it becomes beautiful. [Tirmidhi]
[QUOTE]
NOBLEQURAN: And verily, you (O Muhammad ) are on an exalted standard of character.
YUSUFALI: And thou (standest) on an exalted standard of character.
PICKTHAL: And lo! thou art of a tremendous nature.
SHAKIR: And most surely you conform (yourself) to sublime morality.
Surrah 68 Ayat 4
[/quote]
To be shy or modest, is good... and the prophet (sallallahu 3layhi wa sallam) was the best example of it.
And the last point, this beautiful characteristic shouldn't come in the way of someone forbidding evil and enjoining good.**
What more can I add?
^ point taken 
thanks 
hmmm im bad then
hmm..
Re: How private are you?
Nadia....
there are somethings which shud always remain a secret.....still which should be discussed n still others which should be disclosed...
these three things should be kept in mind.....n it's our decision where to use these rights..
:)
:)
i am a quiet person, generally speaking...its not cuz i am shy, underconfident, snobbish etc...i don't tend to talk a lot with most ppl i come across...and i don't think thats a bad thing ncessarily...it works to my advantage actually...i do make myself heard when its needed...and it actually makes a diff, cuz ppl know i don't talk a lot, so when i do, they pay attention :D
there are a few ppl with whom i'll talk about anythin and everythin...and those are the ppl with whom i feel really comfortable...not that i'm not comfortable with other ppl either...just that some stuff thats considered "private", as a part of ur life, u don't tend to reveal to everyone...dunno what differentiates the ppl with whom i can talk bout anythin and everythin from the rest...just an instinct u know, that i can trust someone them with this etc...dunno if that made sense :D
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Lajawab: *
To be shy or modest, is good... and the prophet (sallallahu 3layhi wa sallam) was the best example of it.
And the last point, this beautiful characteristic shouldn't come in the way of someone forbidding evil and enjoining good.**
What more can I add?
[/QUOTE]
what you can add is the link between modesty and shyness. There are plenty of people who are extremely modest yet are not shy, and are good communicators, examples could be Edhi, hakeem mohammad Saeed..
I would argue that the prophet as modest as he was, was not shy..he was a communicator, he went and talked to people...otherwise how exactly was he going to spread the message.
Why is it that we continue to link words that really are not directly related..
a private person can be very outgoing or very introverted
a modest person can be shy or can be an the life of a party..
**DeSiMuNdA, your first paragraph
sounds oh so familiar :D
Nadia, it's not a bad thing to be quiet if it's not
due to lack of confidence or too much confidence,
snobbiness, stuck headedness, sense of superiority
or anything else that falls in that category of too
much negativity or too much positivity. Moderation
is good.
At times I'm very social and other times I'm
very anti~social. Depends on what kind of mood
I'm in. No matter how close a friend or extended
relative nothing personal from my side has ever
or will ever make it to the table. The only two
people I share EVERYTHING with are my mother
and my spouse. Everyone else need not know.**