How long after marriage should you have a baby?

[mirage]

Re: How long after marriage should you have a baby?

@somegroovychick

we don’t know if fertility issues are actually on the rise, or if its because we’re all on the internet now and talking about it thus making it SEEM like fertility issues are on the rise. fertility treatments are also now more available- and affordable- than before, so, again, it might SEEM like there are more fertility issues but you cannot make a blanket statement like that.

as well, just because your 20s are your biologically optimal age for child-bearing, does NOT mean they are the best for child-rearing which is when the work really starts. pregnancy is a cakewalk compared to actually raising a healthy child. this is something to consider before advising new couples to go ahead and multiply. it really, truly varies from couple to couple- there isn’t any one formula for all.

like gtg said, babies are fun, but husbands are fun too! and since you’ll be raising any babies with your husband, its probably a good idea to get to know them really well before producing your own tiny humans.

also, please don’t say “have a baby and complete your life” because there are quite a few ladies on GS who are struggling with infertility issues and its pretty insensitive to make a statement like that. what if you can’t have children or choose not to? it doesn’t mean you have an incomplete, or unfulfilled, life.

Also please, first, what I said about completing one’s life was in good faith. I didnt honestly bring into consideration the quite a few ladies who are struggling with fertility, and whats bad with struggling? I STRUGGLED TOO. And I dont think anything is anyone’s fault or in anyone’s hands really. I kept good faith and remained positive. So are others I hope. And then obviously I am not thrusting my opinion on others. I dont even believe it actually made anyone else feel as bad as it looks like made you feel. Why anyway should YOU or THEY bother really what I think about life. Life has different meanings of completion for different people. And EVERYONE knows in their heart of hearts whatever completes their own version of life. I have no clue really why did you have to mince my words look the way as if I posted that to hurt someone’s feeling which is obviously the last thing on earth I would want. I know what the longing for a child is and I can understand such feeling better.

SO PLEASE I dont think I need to be told what opinion I hold about life nor should anyone else bother. Or please tell me I should ask for permission before I post here.