How do you know

Lifestyle Relationships
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that the relationship is not worth keeping anymore/it’s time for divorce?

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Re: How do you know

when compromises are impossible and the the love and respect for each other is lost...i.e. reconciliation becomes impossible in spite of mediation through elders of both families.

divorce is the most hated 'lawful' discourse/recourse between couples in the sight of Allah. try to avoid it as far as humanly possible.

3

Re: How do you know

When you know deep down in your heart and mind that you've done every last thing you can do to make it work and it's not working now.

Everyone has a different threshold of what they can bear or not bear, it's up to you to decide how much longer to keep at it--no one can really decide that for you.

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Re: How do you know

When you've tried it all...and I do mean ALL.

But if you have...do not be afraid of the D word.

Allah swt has made it lawful and does not "penalize" because of divorce. Its not a sin and lawful for a reason.

5

Re: How do you know

When before doing anything and everything, you fear about the possible negative impact of it on your relationship, it anit worth it.

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Re: How do you know

I agree....when you've done so much and tried everything...mean everything. That including..having some neutral person try to see both perspectives. Now depend on how and what it is...you can still choose what to do. Try your best to avoid it as much as you can.
Divorce which are given quickly and hastily are usually cause of anger. When we are angry...we try to run away from the things and obviously not thinking from right mind. That is why..go to third party, or elder who can give you right opinion.

Above is all ya follow..when he/she hasn't physically and mentally harmed you and have cheated on you. Rest is up to yaa!

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Re: How do you know

If you're unhappy in your marriage (for whatever reason) and need to make certain changes to make yourself happy, you have let your spouse know what you need in order to be happy, your spouse and you have tried everything possible to make the changes OR your spouse refuses to change....AND

The idea of living the way you're currently living for the next 40 years of your life makes you sick to your stomach.

That's when you move on. A relationship can have love/respect/compromises etc. OR not have it....but at the end of the day, if you're not happy, if you don't enjoy being at home with your spouse, if you feel more at peace when you're alone versus when you're spending time with him...then it's not worth staying in it.

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Re: How do you know

^ This x1000000! It doesn't matter whether others think your problems are worth leaving a marriage. You alone need to decide whether you're able to bear the negatives in the marriage for the rest of your life.

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Re: How do you know

This!
And you should never let anyone make that decision for you. That is, don't let anyone tell you that you haven't done enough or that you are doing too much.
Stick it out until you feel that you can answer to Allah on the day when He calls you to account for your deeds.

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Re: How do you know

I would try a separation living separately cutting off sometimes the idea of absence makes the heart fonder

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Re: How do you know

sometimes what you are "fond of" is not good for you.
so I'm not sure if making the heart fonder is always a step in the right direction.

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I am so sorry Cashmere that you are faced with this and I hope you can end up doing whats better in the long run… I know its hard buddy!!

Peace and love to you :slight_smile:

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Re: How do you know

Life is too short, if you think there is more pain than happiness then leave.