A really good friend of mine is very depressed these days. I know it. She’s been falling ill a lot, she looks down and disturbed. She always has tears in her eyes. I know she’s having some family issues. Her husband actually called me a few days ago asking me to help her because he’s been getting the same vibes.
Of course they both haven’t told me what exactly is bothering her but I really do want to help her feel better. How do I go about doing this?
re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
you mean.. WITHOUT sounding offensive.. (type in the title)
re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
you cant really help without knowing what the issue is. find it out and deal with it accordingly.
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
you mean.. WITHOUT sounding offensive.. (type in the title)
oops :D
Re: How do you help a friend with sounding offensive?
A really good friend of mine is very depressed these days. I know it. She's been falling ill a lot, she looks down and disturbed. She always has tears in her eyes. I know she's having some family issues. Her husband actually called me a few days ago asking me to help her because he's been getting the same vibes.
Of course they both haven't told me what exactly is bothering her but I really do want to help her feel better. How do I go about doing this?
Firstly, you have make sure it's not the initial stages of depression... it's too common these days. For that she has to see the doc. And to make her feel better you need to find out what's bothering her and then go about it any further.
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
You just ask her. You say she's a good friend so really any way you try to help shouldn't come across as offensive.
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
I do have an idea of what's on her mind. She's mentioned some issues to me in the past and I think it's because of that...
I think she's having major financial issues, and while her husband has assured her that he's looking out for her and her children, she can't seem to stop worrying about their future.
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
ask her what's going on, has she tried to talk to you or drop hints/clues before?
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
I did ask her, she said she can't point a finger to it but that I'm right in guessing that she's been down.
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
You can start it off by telling that you've noticed that lately she looks tired and sad....which is unlike herself...and that you wanted to know if everything was okay. Although, if her husband said that he's getting the "same vibes"...could that mean he also doesn't know in full detail about the family issues she's having?
If she doesn't feel like sharing, then don't press her....but let her know that you're "there for her" if she needs to talk.
Try taking her mind off......by inviting her to go shopping/watch a movie/go for a walk with you, etc. The change in surroundings might provide some relief and could even get her to open up with you. You can suggest taking a mini vacation to her husband.
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
so she does admit that she has a problem? sometimes it just takes a little bit of prodding to open up...it's not easy to admit when things aren't going so well, so if she can admit it, even to herself..then thats a big first step.
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
So I did suggest to her husband when he called they maybe she's burnt out and they should go somewhere, so they did during these holidays...for a weekend trip, and she did look all bright and cheery when she returned. She's back to being sick again.
Sara, I guess I just have to work harder at having her open up. I know trust isn't the issue but maybe she doesn't wasn't to share private details? Lemme try again.
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
Hmm, take her out somewhere. Cafe, movies, for a walk, etc. And that might loosen her up enough to share a bit about her problems with you. Sometimes stress can ball people up to the point that they don't feel like opening up. But if they relax a bit....they might.
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
Thank you. Great advice you people.
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
Niksik, you are a very wise & kind lady, whoever is your husband (that if you are married) is One fortunate man to have you by his side. 
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
^ hayeeeee so cute! 
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
omg fainting
[Someone tell TLK please]
Re: How do you help a friend without sounding offensive?
^ lol :D
Masha'Allah =)