how do u come to accept that u lost all ur childhood and boyhood/ girlhood stuff?

Society Religion & Philosophy
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without giving a whole story, there are somethings that one should not have to lose - like a permanent home in one’s home land,

grand parents when they are alive and their “barkat”,

teachers and friends from elementary and middle schools,

personal belongining like clothes, shoes,

childhood toys, crafts that one created with one’s arts teacher or parents for models and academic fairs,

Eid gifts, and other collected things to decorate one’s room in childhood & adolescence,

plants that one seeded with one’s parents

& then one’s country, for being so far way from it…

how many of u feel with way and what are the ways in which you cope with this sense of loss?

Paksitani younge men and women who came to other countries like Canada and US, around 15 years of age, are esp. welcomed to input here.

thanks,

Dush

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Re: how do u come to accept that u lost all ur childhood and boyhood/ girlhood stuff?

i'm still living in my childhood house, but i got rif of most of my childhood stuff, because i did not need it any more.
i am not materialistic, i do prefer my memories of childhood to any objects from this time.
but it is hard to loose the people from childhood: grandparents and parents, and also old people from my neighborhood, who saw me grow and were freinds to me, but who are one by one dying....

deaths of dear ones, those who helped us become adults are the most difficult painffull losses of lost childhood!

the day when you look around and no one from your own childhood days is still alive, this day you feel really old.

MQM is a political reality [split: Sharif Brother's Disqualified!!!]
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Re: how do u come to accept that u lost all ur childhood and boyhood/ girlhood stuff?

dushwari... i came here when i was 14... so i guess u r seeking input from me...
well, in my case.... i have kept just about everything i could and its very refreshing to look at those things from time to time..... Not to say that i live in the past, but I just don't feel like losing those things...

Abt my place in karachi, we didn't sell it... and its there for us when we go back.... It is a priceless feeling to spend time there as i can pinpoint my childhood moments there... Now, how do u get over it.... well, who says you have to? Abt the grandparents and death of the loved ones... never think that they r gone... they r just close to God praying for your well being and your payback to them is to lead a life that can make them proud. Ya, its kinda filmi but hey, anything that can make us feel like heros... take it :)

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Re: how do u come to accept that u lost all ur childhood and boyhood/ girlhood stuff?

Accept today and you will come to accept yesterday!

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Re: how do u come to accept that u lost all ur childhood and boyhood/ girlhood stuff?

I never had any of these wonderful things to begin with.
My parents were always at work and I was left alone with TV and videogames.

What meal would you describe as a 'heart attack on a plate'?
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Re: how do u come to accept that u lost all ur childhood and boyhood/ girlhood stuff?

thanks, i agree.

genuine reply from u made it easy to accept some of it and then leave the rest as is. really, kiya ker sakteye hein.

dua kersakteye hein keye ainda aisey ghar na chowrein, n torein.
kush rahein, abad raheien, jehan bhee rahein - sub acheye log aur innkeye khandan. amen.
best,

DUSH

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Re: how do u come to accept that u lost all ur childhood and boyhood/ girlhood stuff?

nostalgia is a powerful thing. the more you hold on to the past the more you restrict yourself from enjoying the present and having a future.

things change. life changes. time doesnt stop. the sooner we learn to let go of the past the better.

that said, we cannot group material belongings and our loved ones in the same category. i believe it is okay to lament the loss of a loved one or someone who has deeply impacted your life. you cant have the same feelings for material things like a house or your favourite doll etc.

i was really sad when i found out my parents have decided to sell our house in karachi. its been 8 years since ive been back and i would have loved to go back one last time atleast to live in that house. but then i cannot keep myself lost in that thought. i have to be grateful to Allah for what i have right now.. and make the best out of the present.

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Re: how do u come to accept that u lost all ur childhood and boyhood/ girlhood stuff?

enjoying the present makes life beautiful and what is beautiful does not have to be forgotten ,

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Re: how do u come to accept that u lost all ur childhood and boyhood/ girlhood stuff?

Sadly my mamo sold the property where my mother lived and it was part of a family property.
It bothers me everytime i think about it. Inshallah one day i do plan on getting it back and put it for rent keeping one room for ourselves.

My childhood was spent in Saudi Arabia i really don't care about our house there. But i do care about the one in Pakistan. My dadi house :~) 2 of my chacha's live there at the moment and i am so glad i have that same place to go back and call it my dadi house :~) even though she is not there..

Never did I think
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Re: how do u come to accept that u lost all ur childhood and boyhood/ girlhood stuff?

I have moved around so much that I had to discard stuff along the way, cant become a packrat and just take everything along. There are some of my toys and clothes that are more special to my parents than they are to me so they have kept them, so I know they are safe.

amonf my most prized possessions is a matchbox lamborghi countach, known as #8 in my household because it has a #8 on the hood. It was a very fast car so in all races it almost always won :) still have it..but not here, at my parents place in pak. I have to get some stuff when I go.

as far as homes go, the place n saudi, i want to go see sometime, enever throught of it as a perm home so did not get way too atatched to it but still would like to see the place somtime. the homes I had some memories in, my nana;s house and my dada's house are both sold now. Parents place in pak has some memories but they got that place when i had moved to US so it is not as special to me as it is to mys ibligs who actually lived there versus moi just being there for summer or winter break.

That leaves our London home as the only place that evokes those memories of home. It is a very refreshign feeling for em to be back in London and to be back at home.

As far as losing ppl along the way, those I have just lost contact with, sometimes I try to find them and make contact. Those who are not in thsi world, their memories live in my heart and willlive so until I am no longer here.

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Re: how do u come to accept that u lost all ur childhood and boyhood/ girlhood stuff?

join u, fraudia?
u are kidding, right?

kiya mutlab?

ur story is real??