So my neighbors son is 3 years old…I don’t know From where he learned this habit of hiting everyone,like he will hit his father,mothEr even his 1 year old sister…
When first I start going thier home,he used to hit me on my arms and my knees,I used to ignOre coz I thought he is too young to know what hE is Doing,Plus whenever he hit me his mOm will shout at him to stop doing this,few days ago when I went thier home i was talking with his mom,he came and he hit me on my face,it was very aachanak and believe me hurtfull,so what I did was I gave him back a tight slap,
His mom said to me Acha kya,nahi sunta na to aesa hi karna chahiye..
Now my question is,whatever said,was she really mean it or may be she didn’t like it? And what I did was a correct thing or i shouldn’t have slap him?
Kinzz, I really liked the way you framed your post. So, first of all, it sounds like when he hit you and you slapped him back, it was completely a reaction on your part and not necessarily out of rage. Perfectly normal.
Secondly, experts say that if a child is misbehaving physically like hitting or biting, the parent should sit the child down and do the same to him/her (of course a lot more gently and NOT out of anger) to show them what they are doing hurts people. We knew a kid who bit everyone, HARD. They took him to an expert who said, sit him down one day and show him what a bite feels like and he'll never do it again. The mother sat him down, told him she was going to bite him and did it, again, NOT out of anger. That kid never bit again.
Finally, if you are worried about your friend being mad at you, you could just call her and be honest and apologize, say you feel bad and that it was purely a reaction and that you hope she doesn't hold it against you. It sounds like if you are still thinking about it, you MUST feel bad, so no harm in letting your friend know, she'll appreciate it.
**hitting your own child is a NO NO let alone someone Else's child. disciplining a child is the job of the parents [within limits] and NOT that of anyone Else's.
in your case, i do NOT agree with you hitting the child yourself.
since the boy hit you right in front of the mother, you should have told the child that hitting is a very bad thing and he must NOT hit anyone.
you should have talked about this to his mom over the phone at a later time when she was would have been more receptive of what you wanted to say.
you must tell her that she needs to take the matter seriously and this behavior is totally unacceptable. he may get in a serious fight with other kids and may get into some serious problem with the law when he gets older. the boy may have some kinda disorder and the mother must take the child to a Psychiatrist or to a 'Child Behavioral Specialist' NOW before it gets too late and things get out of hand.
violence begets ONLY violence...he, at the moment, knows that he can hit anyone and get away with it. it's NOT a normal or acceptable behavior and this could be due to some kinda behavioral disorder and needs to be addressed NOW before it gets too LATE!**
Kinzz, you actually slapped a 3 year old kid in front of his mum cos he slapped you first? For God's sake he is a child, 3 years old and you are the adult! I am horrified at reading this.
You DO NOT hit someone else's child, what were you thinking? You wanted to know if you did the right thing, no you didn't. You need to be the bigger person and dismiss this attack on you, you should not hold it against him personally.
I agree with Khalil's post and this sounds to me that the kid is being hit on a regular basis and is mimicing what his parents are doing. Kids are not naughty, they learn behaviour from those around them. This child needs love and help, also a lot of pyar mohobat from his parents, it's not their fault, they just don't know how to deal with this, doesn't make them bad parents. I am horrified also that the kids mum did nothing to stop this behaviour, she should have punished him with time out or a good telling off.
It is true, violence only breeds violence and my concern is that if the child is bitten or slapped just to show how painful it is, the danger is that he will keep on doing it because it was shown to him and how it was done. I really don't see how that can help.
