highway driving phobia

[Ira]

@haimeradil

why in the world are you driving while you are pregnant. isn’'T that dangerous. espeically considering how much stress this puts on you. you poor dear.

haimeradil, thank you for your concern but i have to finish teh semester i am taking.

@Mirch

I would suggest you drive to your school for at least 2 weeks daily , with your hubby besides you. Since it is 35 minutes drive only you and he should be able to take some time out every day for next two weeks. That will help you overcome this phobia.

Mirch, thank you so much for your advice. I think i am going to do that with hubs next to me.

@Gemini_the_Great

ok honestly even I thought you were scared because of the baby but looks like you already had the symptoms! What exactly are you scared of?? Is it the speed? careless drivers on the road??

It was something that happened last year i think but i am not sure if its related. I was going pretty fast and almost lost control of my car but didnt, ALhamdulillah.

@Xenophanez

Ira:- I think it has more to do with your natural maternal instincts, now you are more protective (a bit extra carefull in this case actually) The best option would be to avoid driving if you can. ask your hubby or some other family member to drop you off.

Xeno, at this time its not practical for my husband to drop him off. And i hate to be so dependent on him, i am not that kind of person. Not to say tht he hasnt looked into other options for me.

@ume-zafeerah

On mapquest.com there is always an option “avoid highways” you can find the way to your work without highway.But the only drawback is that it takes much longer then you can imagine.

Ume, worse comes to work, i might give that a try. hubby looked up a way for me last week.

@Jal_Pari

Mirch is right…the more often you drive on highway the better you would be…I get to drive once in a blue moon like once or twice a month on the highway and trust me I go through exactly same thing. Specially when those huge trucks pass by it is the worse feeling.
But if you are pregnant…i would not recommend you put yourself through high stress and intense fear.

Jal pari, i cant quit now, i dont wnat to quit. The semester is almost 5 weeks till finals.

@PSquared

You could try and avoid highways by using inner roads.

Ive got this fear of driving on highways because I was in a very bad accident when I was about 19 yrs old and I cant get over it no matter what I do.

I avoid it as much as possible but if I cant then I stay in the right lane, dont go over 60 mph and always make sure Im never driving in a pack of cars. At all times, I make sure if something goes wrong, I can have an “out”. This makes me feel a little safer.

Psquared, thank you for your concerns. You didnt scare me at all. The other day, some other lady who couldnt control her car and hit the side blocks really hard almost hit my car (she was in the fast lane and i was in the slow lane). Shukar hai bachat hogayi. Alhamdulillah no one was hurt. I surprisingly took that really well.

@shay9164

Ira, you should read ayatal kursi and dua e safar constantly while driving, you will ease by yourself knowing that you’re in Allah swt’s protection.

Shay, i do that yaar,i recite ayat ul kursi, charoun qul, astaghfar etc. Also keep listening to either the radio or quran.

@ShiNoO

Ira, I had the same fear.
I’ve had my license for 7 yrs but never owned a car so I just drove once in a blue moon.
One year prior to getting my license I was involved in a car accident on the highway (as a passenger).

Now a while back when my husband pushed me to drive the car more often I knew it was time to ‘face my fears’. I was fine driving in town and stuff but highway was a big nono. So then I booked 2 lessons with an instructor who was specialised in ‘dealing with fear/trauma’s/anxiety while drving’. We did two long lessons on the highway and alhamdulillah I actually enjoyed it.
After those 2 lessons I drove with my husband sitting next to me, he gave me a few pointers too and made sure I checked the mirrors a few times while overtaking and now I am fine

Shinoo, that class doesnt sound like a bad idea. Can you share some pointers with me via PM when you get a chance?

@sadi79

Ira salam,

I got my license late in life and the bottom line was that I was petrified of driving. And forget abt driving on highways all I wanted to do was scream when I saw cars racing past me… I tried to get over this fear by going at times when the flow of traffic was less, and initially during heavy traffic times I would even have my blinkers on so that I could drive at the slow pace that I wanted to. Do keep reading dua-e-safar, ayat ul kursi and for the longest time I didn’t even switch on the radio so that I would have no distractions whatsoever. Do keep us posted on how ur progress is coming along..it will take some time and a lot of patience but it can be done. Good luck dear…

sadi79, thank you for your kind words. I will post back here in a few weeks as to what is working if its w orking.

@Nikema

Ira, its something that many people face. The only thing you have to do is not to think too much the whole driving part of it. One way the counter that is by developing a habit of listening to radio and listening to news. Make a cd of songs that used to like when you were high school or even in younger age, what that will do is it will take ur mind off driving and u will feel less intimidated

Nikema, i keep listening to either quran or the radio while driving but still some days its just bad

@cricketplaya

What are you scared of? What degree was this fear at before you were pregnant? Obviously now you are more conscious. Anyways, think of it as a routine. You want to provide your future child the best life possible, for that you have to work hard (study) and not let these little fears stop you. Just think of your future child. Insh’Allah all be will be fine.

Other possible suggestions you maybe thought of.. switch schools, public transport maybe, online classes?

cricket, i mentioned above as to when i think the phobia started. I almost lost control of my car once and i think i realised i coul dhave killed someone. Alhamdulillah no one was hurt. I think it started then but i am not sure. I have been freaking out after summer, when i got pregnant. And call me whatever, but i dont wnat to quit school because i am afraid. I want to fix this. I love my school, i love doing what i do. I dont want to a chicken and throw all this away and have to tell my kids 10 years down the road how mommy couldnt finish her degree because she was afraid of driving. Even now it sounds pathetic

Guys you all are awesome. I think i am going to take up Mirch;s idea and drive on short stretches with hubs next to me. I think what scares me alot also is that the exits are so far spaced and i dont have an exit strategy. So i sty on the right in case i want to stop. Meanwhile, i just have to plug it along twice a week. Hopefully i can overcome this stupid fear soon.