Re: HELP ME
Pakilover, you'll be sure to get better advice on this topic in the Life1 forum rather than in the Cafe. ;]
Re: HELP ME
pakilover have u even ever met the guy? ur a non-desi and he is a desi living in pakistan. are you sure he isn;t just using u as a means to get to the usa by marrying u? 17 and 18? why r u guys even thinking about marriage?
Re: HELP ME
I dont get it when young kids who have no clue who they are and what will they do in their life get this diease of so called love.
These kids dont even know what love is and yet they are the one who use that word the most.
I would put my kid in army school if i find out they are going off the track.
Re: HELP ME
Ppl, when you are proposed to and you accept that means you’re engaged! Formal/family engagement is a different thing and can happen later on.
Pakilover, how were you communicating with him so far? Did your parents find out and have now stopped you from using the telephone or something? Anyway, you both are very young and even though you may love each other a lot, it may be best to just wait to get married. It will be tough, but perhaps he can move to the U.S.? Just let your parents cool down and leave the marriage issue alone for now. Good luck 
Re: HELP ME
TALK TO THEM!
Re: HELP ME
Damn i came to see the online engagement tips and tricks 
guys let her speak.. now a days kids know more then older ppl.. so let her talk 
to haan janu.. bolo.. engagement ka ring kaysay send kia? i mean mail main or webcam main u put ur finger on the screen and on the other side he did a fake acting of putting his mom’s ring in ur finger 
any plans for nikkah? 
Re: HELP ME
lol attia, the e-engagament sounds so funny. Don't mock the girl though, poor thingis already in low spirits :(
Re: HELP ME
im sorry femme but : hahahahahahaha - You are seventeen. Suck it up and move on.
The last time I thought I was in love was yesterday and look at how well I'm doing.
p.s. what is it with NY desis? :Freaks: :p
Re: HELP ME
You sounded upset when I called love a disease…
Re: HELP ME
^^ all of you should stop ridiculing her, Rather then being helpful. And for once stay on topic...
First of all Pakilover, you need to provide more information regarding your fianace. More Importantly answer the following
1- how you met him
2- Did he ever come to NY
3- When did you get engaged
4- How did you get engaged
5- Why did you engage without letting your parents know
6- What are the reasons that your parents disallow it.
Re: HELP ME
abay wahee to main pooch rahee tee
kaysay howa engagement… Nikkah kab hay.. milay kaysay us say 
yaar iam still waiting for the tricks.. qasam say har din engagement karongee 
Re: HELP ME
Wait. . . he's eighteen? Where did you guys get that from? She said she was seventeen going on eighteen and he was older?
How old is he exactly paki?
and really, you should meet him before you marry him
and i think someone brought it up before, but you should be absolutely very careful that he's not only marrying you because of greencard. . .
Re: HELP ME
abey yar tum to chup hi raho..
on one side you call stocks haram and on the other side you dotn think its wrong for a 17 year old to go after a guy. to go against her parents when she has no freakin clue what she is doing…
Sorry but i find you a hypocrite
Re: HELP ME
on one side you call stocks haram and on the other side you dotn think its wrong for a 17 year old to go after a guy. to go against her parents when she has no freakin clue what she is doing...
Sorry but i find you a hypocrite
nia,
I never said that it is not wrong, but by ridiculing her and instead of giving her advice, all i see is that you ladies are not interested in helping her understand.
She came here to get some advice, not to be laughed at. If you people cannot give an advice then it is better that you keep your mouth shut (sorry but nothing personal here).
As far as stocks go --> Please discuss it in that thread before coming to conclusion.
Re: HELP ME
OH NO YOU DIDNT!
itsme01 - As far as giving her the advice is concern. She is 17 and he is 18 what advice would you give to your daughter?
-considering she went behind your back and got herself engaged.
I am curious to see your reply then i will state my point.
***waiting…
oh and there is no point of discussing stocks with you. Your view and statements were compeltely pointless… lets put an end to that right there
Re: HELP ME
pakiluva...ok u are very young to get married in my opinion. i would tell u to put that guy on hold and enjoy your life till you are like 25 and then get hitched. but its your own decision. i am assuming you are not independent. so if you do go for this guy against your parents wishes be prepared to not only be cut off from your family but totally dependent on this guy. its important to know exactly what u are getting yourself into and that the guy is extremely trustworthy and serious. (hello? he is 18...probably not financially stable)
and analyze the situation .... why does this boy want to get married so soon? are his parents in favor of the marriage so early? one important question....will this guy get a greencard after getting married to you?
on the other hand if his parents do not accept you or early marriage then you need to know how desi boys work....there is a huge chance of default by the guy if his parents are not supportive of the marriage. so be very careful.
again i am assuming alot of things and i am still wondering why you would want to get married so early.
however i wouldnt say you are doomed if you do because i know a girl who left her house to marry the guy she loved (she was 18) both of them were financially unstable and very young. after the girl ran away...parents agreed to marriage out of fear of shame in the community...she came back and they got nikaafied the respectful way and now she has a little boy and sounds very very happy everytime i speak to her.
Re: HELP ME
itsme01 - As far as giving her the advice is concern. She is 17 and he is 18 what advice would you give to your daughter? -considering she went behind your back and got herself engaged.
See the last post by SD. That is what i will do. Get into a peceful dialogue and explain her and get to know her side. She is 17, and can think for herself, but needs someone to guide her to right direction
Re: HELP ME
itsme be realistic and be honest.
You are telling me you will still be clam and pretend everything is fine even if your daughter claims she is engaged. It seems like you definately has alot more patience then me.
Yeah i also strongly feel there is no point of getting married at this early age. Both guy and girl have no freakin clue what they want from their lives. They are very young and immature.
last but not least if my daughter or son falls in to any of these things. I am the one to blame. I probably didnt teach them the right things.
It bothers the crap out of me when i see young girl or boy falling in love wasting their lives at such early age especially those who live in here or western side of the world. They have everything they want or even if they dont they can still get some where on their own. Plus we have thousands of homeless girls and boys back home in Pakistan. Who are willing to do anything to become something in life. Who want to do something for their country who want to go far in life. There are those who want to do something for their blind mother or disabled father.
It hurts me when i see someone who has everything in life that anyone would want but they are falling after someone.
I am not against love i think i am one of those people who think marriage should not happen if there is no love. But at this early age Sorry i have no patience for stupidity.
last thing- If my daughter or son falls in to these stupid things to a point where they are engaged. I am blaming myself for that. I did something wrong while raising them and i am going to fix it. I would probably take the next flight back home the moment we land there beat the crap out of my kid and send to Army school.
Re: HELP ME
thanx. the thing people dont seem to understand he is not 18 or 19 he is 31 i met him when he was 30 but i dont think that age matters only that you love the person matters. i cry every night and sometimes during the day i cant stand it it hurts too much
Re: HELP ME
my advice would be to get married to him. your parents will eventually come round to it.