Re: hello insomniacs
Hey! 
my hands are clean! i just used them to dig dirt and boogers. they’re clean…right?
Araam nal beh 
what a typical ramsay kitchen nightmares episode is like:
i’ve been invited to check out restaurant fail 
bloody hell, it looks like i’ve walked into a funeral home 
bring me all the dishes on the menu, meanwhile i’ll go talk to the customers
paid customer #1, yeah my burger had a mouse on it, but i still ate half of it
ramsay: a mouse?? and it looks like it’s from a box that’s been reheated in a microwave. bloody hell 
what in the world is this? you call this a carbonera? this looks like crap! i wouldn’t feed this to my dog! get me the owner! 
owner: i’m doing the best job i can. my waiters are crap, my earnings are crap. my food’s amazing. even though there is falling paint in it, i still stand by my food 
ramsay: you’re fudging crazy!!
fight fight fight. argue argue argue. cry cry cry. swear swear swear
welcome to your new restaurant. i’ve renamed it to non-fail restaurant
i had no idea my restaurant had this much potential. thank you chef 
i hope they improve after this. they’ve worked bloody hard and i have faith in the owners.